In Celebration of the Paris Olympic Games—Past and Present

Paris is one of two cities to host the Olympics three times. (Can you name the other? Answer at the bottom). As we make way for the the pomp, circumstance, competition, medal count and the trivia that only comes every four years with the summer games. I can't help think about this same event in the same locale—a century prior. How? Why? The movie Chariots of Fire features the Games of the VIII Olympiad in the City of Lights, and one of its heroes, is my hero, too.

Chariots of Fire is one of four sports movies to have won the Oscar for Best Film. (Can you name the other three? Answer at the bottom). Historians verify what the 1981 award winning film underscored: politics have never been in the background. Five years after WWI ended, fascism was rising. In the 1924 Olympics, there was a pressing sentiment to represent one's country with aplomb and in doing so, it's values as well. 

Eric Liddell, a runner, devout Christian, and Scot was told by the British selection committee: "King first, then God." However, this is not why Liddell (or his teammate Harold Abrahams) ran. What he sought to prove, who he desired to represent  was King of Kings—Jesus of Nazareth, Christ the Lord. Liddell's example is worth considering as we hear the stories and learn the motivation of many other athletes in the next 17 days. 

As written on IMDB

Chariots of Fire is the true story of two British track athletes competing in the 1924 Summer Olympics. One is a devout Scottish missionary who runs for God, the other is a Jewish student at Cambridge who runs for fame and to escape prejudice.

Told in flashback, Chariots of Fire features the British sprinters as rivals and later as friends. In a warm-up 100-meter race, Liddell defeats Abrahams, who hires a pro trainer to prepare him. Liddell, whose qualifying heat is scheduled for a Sunday, refuses to run despite pressure from the Olympic committee. A compromise is reached when a nobleman allows him to compete in his 400-meter slot. Liddell and Abrahams win their respective races and go on to achieve fame as missionary and businessman/athletic advocate, respectively.

As the story proclaims, Liddell sought to honor God by observing His commands. He did not compete on the Christian Sabbath. The trials took place on a Sunday. Therefore, instead of running in his best race, he ran the qualifier for the 400 m and in Paris—and, he won (in 47.6 seconds). The BBC Scotland website says that, "Without doubt one of Scotland’s greatest sporting heroes, Eric Liddell, owes much of his fame more to a race he didn’t run than any he did."

In the article "Running for God," Lucy Russell writes, "Liddell lived out the Gospel values; using the talents God had given him. He was motivated in all areas of his life, including his sport, to honor and glorify Christ. The point is that when we use our talents to serve and glorify God, we share with him a sense of pleasure and fulfillment. There is certain mutuality here, blessed with the talents God has given us, we have the opportunity to achieve something with him: Them that honor me, I will honor. (1 Samuel 2:30)."

These are the stories of Sports and Spirituality. What motivates an Olympian beyond the gold medal? Beyond athletic training, how might they seek to manifest the motto of the games: Citius - Altius - Fortius. (words that mean Faster - Higher - Stronger). Liddell offers his own testimony. When the daily coverage comes to a close, take a moment to watch/revisit this scene. It is seminal to Sports and Spirituality. 

Or, offer this prayer:

I'd like to compare faith to running in a race.

It's hard. It requires concentration of will, energy of soul.
A runner experiences elation when the winner breaks the tape! But how long does that last?
Life will present its challenges. Who am I to say "believe, have faith?!"
I can only point the way. Why? 

Everyone runs in their own way.
Where does the power come from to see the race to the end? From within.
Jesus said "Behold the Kingdom of God is within you. Seek me and ye shall find."

Let us pray the Our Father.

Enjoy the Games of the XXXIII Olympiad

Trivia Answers:

1. London
2. Million Dollar Baby, Rocky, Gladiator*

Photo Credits
Rings: (Ryan Pierse/Getty Images)
Liddell

Fandom as Friendship: Life Lessons from Klay Thompson

For a full week, Bay Area sports radio was unable to stray from conversation, conjecture, criticism and critique on the departure of Klay Thompson from the Golden State Warriors. I  listened twice to the ESPN Daily Podcast: Why Klay Thompson's Exit Spells the End of the Warriors' Dynasty to gain a better understanding of how this happened... why it happened...and more. The more I read (and hear), the less I really know. One thing however is certain, this Splash Brother will be missed. If it's not for an era that seems to have passed, it's for what could have been. Thus, I would like to offer the tribute as a way to thank #11 for all the life lessons he offered both on and off the hardwood. Sports and Spirituality is a better class because of Thompson and his impact on the "Klay Area." Here are but a few ideas and understandings gained from this Warrior. 

What Meets the Eye
In 2019, Klay Thompson purchased a house but five homes from where I live. Though the article says his digs were near the Chase Center, his real estate agent informed me was on Washington— a street that dead ends into Alta Vista Park. Given that I park on the street—my unit on Fillmore and Washington does not include parking—I usually find a spot in and around this locale. 

Standing 6'6" Thompson is easily recognizable. I have no doubt I would have seen him and tried to do so. I am certain he would have taken his bulldog Rocco out to walk and enjoy the remarkable 360 degree vistas of the city from Alta Vista. I hope I would have respected his privacy and yet I would like to believe I would have been a fun and friendly neighbor. 

Unfortunately for fans like me, it never happened. Due to personal reasons, Klay did not move in and well, that idea lives on as but a dream (and a story). 

When I told this story to my former roommate, she asked me if I ever figured out who lived in the house two doors down from Klay. "Why?" I asked. She replied "Well, a Lincoln town car sits in front of it every day and picks somebody up. I've always wondered who lives there."

I have seen that black limo she mentioned every single work day for at minimum two or three years, before COVID. Not once did I think twice about it. I never wondered who ordered it or why. In short, my vision caught sight of it but I'm not sure I saw it. It registered and yet it didn't. 

The contrast presented by what I saw but didn't see and what I wanted to see has always been striking to me. What do we see and why? What do we want to see? What do we not see? 

These questions and this story is such an important metaphor for the spiritual life. How? Why? Because for so many of us seeing is believing. However, the spiritual life demands something more. As mentioned in the article "Team Leader" Notre Dame's new president Father Bob Dowd, C.S.C. states, "Among other things, I see my role as a priest as one who helps people to believe that there is more to life than what meets the eye and that God is with them."

I stopped when I read his message. I have long believed that is my job too. Such is the task of a teacher of Sports and Spirituality. The course is not about public displays of faith—athletes pointing to the sky. Rather, I aim to help young people see the world through a different lens—a sacramental one. At its best it's one of meaning and grace, that is open to the many ways God is working in the world. With all due respect to Klay, life isn't about seeing just what we want to see. Instead, what else might we see, notice, acknowledge and recognize that is hidden in plain sight? That requires a new perspective or point of view? That has a deeper meaning? 

Lights Out
In the event this metaphor needs extension, let's unpack a test run by ESPN's Sports Science after Thompson scored 37 points in just one quarter. Thompson set an NBA record and prompted this blog post as it exemplified the concept of FLOW.

Every athlete has heard the words "keep your eye on the ball." This science determined that during a shot, Klay keeps his eyes locked on the target for 90% of his shooting motion. This allows him to use visual information to guide the ball from his hands to the target. For the sake of science, John Brenkus sought to discover: How might that change with the lights out?  Watch the video for the amazing scientific explanation. I'll offer the metaphorical one.

Thompson made 80% of his shots in total darkness. His form was was remarkably consistent. In other words: the trained eye will see. Form will not only follow function, it will flourish. We will do what we need to do and see what we need to see with training, commitment, practice and performance. I guess Father Bob and I need to keep at it!

Fandom as Friendship
Though I have not read much about this, I think to be a fan is to enter into a particular kind of friendship. To really follow and stay loyal to a certain player means you take on a certain responsibility. You support and defend your friends. You give them grace and space. You pay attention to their joys and their struggles, their passions and pursuits. To lose Klay Thompson from the Warriors is to see a neighborhood friend move away. In life, people change...they move on. Perhaps a new opportunity is for the best. But, doesn't mean it's easy.

When Thompson signed with the Mavericks, I immediately thought of my former colleague and friend Matt Balano. I think of him often, but especially in times like this, I would like to know his thoughts on the deal. I trusted him and his input. At my gym, I had to reach out to my friend's boyfriend. I know that Klay is one of his favorite players. I wanted him to know, I knew what all of this might mean for him. It's a loss. Ugh.

I have written about Klay Thompson in this context before, in the blog post: Friendships from Sports: Another Jewel of Life. It is better to have loved this friend, than to have never have had the friendship at all? Tennyson had it right. 

The Athletic writer, Marcus Thompson II said it best with this tribute. Thompson was genuine enough to be in relationship with us—his fans. He did bare his soul. I'm grateful we kept him strong. That's what friends can do. That is what friendship is about. We are all witnesses to that gift—seen and unseen. Thank you for the life lessons, the wins and even the losses. You will be missed; you are beloved, Klay. 

Photo Credits
Marcus Thompson
Mavericks

The Tale of Two Images: Donald Trump and Kate Middleton

We live in a 24-hour news cycle and still, news is always breaking. Or let me put this into the double negative—news is never not breaking. Regardless, certain stories rise above the fray. Some matters are more newsworthy than others. They capture our attention and characterize our conversation....and they should. We listen and lean in to learn more. We seek to understand. We celebrate and grieve. We question and ponder. How do you make sense of current events? What helps you process?

I talk to people I trust. I listen to podcasts and read from certain web sources. Social media offers information (and misinformation), video reels and reports and photographs. Images are not in short supply and yet, like the news stories, certain ones capture a moment or a feeling. They stay with us and have helped me make sense of the world today. Such is the story of two contrasting pictures that punctuated news of this past weekend. They feature two very different events and people: Donald Trump and Princess Catherine.

The first was taken following the attempted assassination of former President Donald J. Trump at a rally in Pennsylvania on Saturday evening on July 13, 2024.

After shots were fired by the lone gun man, Trump was immediately rushed offstage to his motorcade, with blood visible on his right ear and streaking across his cheek. He pumped his fists and shouted “Fight!” to the crowd before being driven away. This image quickly emerged as the visual cover to this story. Many of his supporters continue to promulgate it for the message its sends is unapologetic. 

In my class, I offer a number of definitions of the word "spiritual" or "spirituality." A fair question to ask is Is this image spiritual? Strangely enough, I think it is.

I see a man who is downright defiant. He was given a chance to defer to the secret service—to emerge vulnerable and show fear. Instead, he makes a point to react with resistance. He is not humble; he is angry. Perhaps his approach appeals to you. It's possible that you want a Commander in Chief like this. I think it could be different. What do you see?

According to Ron Rohlheiser, spirituality how we channel our longings—our eros. It is a powerful force. It is not always "kumbaya," or static or staid. This image is spiritual because it lends insight into DJT's desire....and desire is not always a good thing.

Less than 24 hours later, a very different image emerged as Kate Middleton walked into Centre Court at the Wimbledon Championship. As written in People

As they took their seats in the front row of the Royal Box, the crowd rose to their feet, giving Princess Kate a standing ovation. Princess Charlotte beamed with pride at her mom, who waved with a smile, visibly moved. The applause resonated deeply, marking a rare and emotional public appearance for Kate amid her cancer treatment.

Karwai Tang, the photographer who captured the sweet moment, tells PEOPLE: “When [Kate] usually comes in, she walks down the steps and into her seat. She doesn’t normally stand and wave. But she stood for a while and took it all in. For her to acknowledge it and take in the applause was special."

She could have really extended the applause (see the reel and you will notice this moment is brief). Instead, she chose to take a seat and let the day be about the competition. In this moment, it's hard to see Kate as anything other than a mom, a sister, and a beloved public figure. I think the tears that filled my eyes as I watched this unfold confirm that it too, it spiritual.

Tennis fans like me wondered if she would make it to the tourney. With her husband and son in Germany for the EuroCup finals to support England, Kate, her sister Pippa and daughter Charlotte had a great girls' day out. Would have been awesome for them to be at the women's final as well. With Billie Jean King and Martina Navratilova in the stands, tennis royalty was there instead. Here's to next year.

In her own unassuming way, Kate is a powerful force. Her smile, humility and kindness magnify her beauty. What do you see?

The image of Donald Trump doesn't tell the story of the two lives lost on that day. I listened to the New York Times' "The Daily" podcast, The attempted assassination of Donald Trump. to make more sense of it all.

As the synopsis states: "Doug Mills, a photographer for The Times, recounts what it was like to witness the shooting, and Glenn Thrush, who covers gun violence for The Times, discusses the state of the investigation into the man who did it."

Ten minutes into it, I had to hit pause and stop listening. The reality of gun violence in this country is too upsetting and real. Sadly, we know how this story ends. 

Conversely, the image of Kate doesn't tell the story of those who might not return to our public places and our favorite spaces after a cancer diagnosis. What that we could not give them, their family members and caregivers a standing ovation as well. 

The adage "a picture is worth a thousand words" remains true—but that's not where the story ends. Let us give voice to what we see. Explain how an image makes you feel and discuss why that feeling is important. Was do you want to remember? What might be hard to forget? Is it spiritual? Why or why not?

Photo Credits
DJT
KM

The Gift of Life: How and Why. One Non-Directed Kidney Donor's Story

In the United States, more than 100,000 people are waiting for a kidney transplant. In the meantime, the median wait time is more than three years. Perhaps you know someone who is on that fateful list. Or, maybe you know someone who is a living donor. Potential donors, willing donors and actual donors are moms and dads, aunts and uncles, siblings and neighbors. They are teachers, athletes and friends. One of them happens to be my cousin, Amy. 

Amy is what is known as a non-directed kidney donor. This means that on June 6, 2024 Amy electively, freely and officially donated her kidney to a person she may never meet or talk to. She was the first person in a four person chain. In other words, she was the catalyst, the wildcard, the x factor for eight surgeries that  afforded four individuals with new kidneys. This is her story.

The positive power of social media
As a teacher and an adult, the tenor of conversations about social media is rarely positive. The focus seems to center on its addictive nature and the detrimental effects on the mental health and well being of young people. It's not hard to see how it has taken its toll on interpersonal relationships and productivity. At its worst, social media can lead to isolation, cyberbullying, gross misinformation and more. The shadow sides are real, but that perspective is limited. 

As we know, social media helps people stay connected, gain information about current events; it provides a platform to promote our passions, and share our stories. Many times, the ideas, questions and calls to action make an impact. Listeners and followers are not passive people. A dynamic relationship has taken root and leads to something new... something unexpected... something more. Such is the case with Amy—a follower of @SharonSaysSo and the podcast Freakonomics.

Listening Up
Before the election in October 2020, Sharon McMahon, a past high school Government teacher, photographer, and business coach, started teaching about how the Electoral College worked. Sharon sought to post non-partisan truth on politics and government systems. She created short videos posted on Instagram as @SharonSaysSo about the basics of the U.S. Government. Amy and her sister Jodi found her format helpful and informative. Sharon became a household name and her posts a regular point of conversation. But how might that lead to kidney donation? A platform dedicated to Civics doesn't seem a likely venue to prompt such altruism. Right? Wrong.

Following a person's podcast or blog affords a special lens into the creator's life. One's personal reality is seldom completely detached from what we do and how we do it. For example, Sharon's followers know that she has a six year old son (and three other children), that she loves wildlife and has a husband who had renal failure. As written on Destination Duluth, When the pandemic hit in 2020, her husband needed a kidney transplant and had to be in Rochester at the Mayo Clinic, Thankfully, her husband’s transplant was successful.  As a loyal listener, Amy was dialed in—aware and empathetic to his plight, his journey and praise God, his recovery.

Furthermore, social media—its influence, stories, lessons and lore does not exist in isolation. Amy also listens to Freaknomics. One episode "Make Me a Match" was the spark and to the kindle from @SharonSaySo. A fire started burning.

Amy looked into what it would take to become a non-directed kidney donor with personal research and reflection. In addition to multiple blood draws and urine samples, she underwent extensive physical and psychological testing,  She realized this was something she could do. It became something she wanted to do. How? Why?

The How
To me, the  how of organ donation  is endlessly fascinating. Through Amy, I have learned that just 1% of kidney transplants involve a non-directed kidney donor. Though understandable, only about 100 people a year elect to make this life saving gift. Furthermore, many willing donors are not approved. However, as a marathon runner (she has run over 20 of them) I was not surprised that her kidney was in great shape. She registered with the University of Washington health center in Seattle and was told they would match her kidney—based on her blood and tissue types as well as her age. In three months time, the recipient of her kidney can reach out to her to share their story—or not. Amy understands why someone might choose to remain anonymous. Time will tell.

Amy's surgery was delayed about two weeks because the intended recipient had an infection. On donation day, she was informed that she had total freedom to change her mind. If she wanted to back out no one would second guess her decision. Though one's kidneys are located in the back of the stomach area, just below the rib cage, and on each side of the spine, kidney removal is through the abdomen. Her surgeon was able to remove hers by hand through her four inch incision. Her kidney now accompanies the recipient's two others. That's right, Amy has one kidney and her recipient now has three.

Amy was told after donating her kidney she must limit salt and alcohol and medications like Advil, Aleeve, and Aspirin are off the table. As a runner, this is no small sacrifice but Amy's point of view on that and why she did this are no different.

My Aunt Wendy's first marathon: 2010. Amy and I ran the half

The Why
Amy's why is very clear. It also happens to be in the form of a question. She decided to donate her kidney because she believes, "How often do you get to save a life?" Hearing this question prompts a pause. Awe. Inspiration. Hard to argue that...and it's true. Amy has saved a life in the most literal sense possible. But I'd like to think it's metaphorical as well. More on that later.

Amy credits her parents (or blames them?!) for the example they have always shown. Her mom— my Aunt Wendy and her dad—my Uncle Jay are two of the more hospitable, supportive and generous people I know. Though I don't live that close to them, I have always known their home to be a place of welcome for friends, family and those in need. Clearly those values have taken shape in their daughters.

Amy noted that her mom has passed on Tikkun Olam—a Hebrew phrase that means "repairing the world" or "mending the world." I am familiar with this principle because it underscores the ethics course I teach. Organ donation is a moral issue. It ushers in several ethical questions worth considering such as Why not create an open market for organ donors? And What is altruism? Is anyone truly altruistic? I think we have a pretty good answer here. 

Amy thanked her Dad for living by the words of Luke's Gospel. In Luke 12:48, he writes "Much will be required of the person entrusted with much, and still more will be demanded of the person entrusted with more." I appreciate her humility and willingness to live this teaching.

At one point her surgeon moved her to a recovery room with a view. He said “heroes go to that side of the building.” Amy is many things—she’s fun and funny, loyal and loving. She’s an awesome teacher, runner, wife, daughter, sister, aunt and friend. Hero is one too.

5 of 8 Stricherz women/cousins. 7 of 8 are teachers ;-) 

L’Chaim
I traveled to the Pacific Northwest this summer because I wanted to spend time with Amy and her family. I wanted to see and hear for myself more about this journey. Why?

To me, Amy flipped the script. Most of us live our lives in a fairly predictable way. As one of many Stricherz teachers, I know that summer brings for all of us time to travel and reach personal goals. We get more time with family and friends. We come together to celebrate and remember, all the while doing our personal best and hoping for the best for the next generation. In Amy, I found that some of us step up and out into the world in a totally selfless, loving and new way. 

While it makes sense that Amy might donate a kidney, it's nothing anyone of us could have ever predicted. I have always felt fortunate to have cousins that I love and admire, but in Amy I have a family member I want to share with the world. She has given me a new look on life, She has reignited my sense of hope. She makes me cry (in a good way) and smile at the same time. The movie InsideOut should consider adding a character like this one.

3 donors!

I wasn't sure if I was going to write about Amy's story, but after our time together. I realized I couldn't not try to. I asked her if it would be okay as she took me to the airport. Though she is not a person to seek personal attention, I had a sense that she would say “yes,” if but for the purpose that her testimony might prompt another non-directed donor to step in and up.

At weddings and special occasions, you might have heard the word L’Chaim. It is a Hebrew phrase that translates to “to life.” But it's more than just words. I have wondered if the people who say it know what it actually means.

I have learned that some words can never be fully translated. We can get close but it's best to share a story or consider the sentiment behind the word to understand what it really means. As I was processing all of what I have learned through Amy and his gift of life, I came to the realization that her story captures L’Chaim perfectly. My only regret is that when we were all together on Sunday, I didn’t think to raise a glass and say that. A good reason to return.
Love you, AES

Photo Credits
Kidney Chain
Kidney Heart

An Open Letter to Harrison Butker—Thoughts on Vocation and Staying in One's Lane

Dear Mr. Butker,
Congratulations on your second Super Bowl championship. On Super Bowl Sunday, I went from mass to a friend's house where I watched every minute of Super Bowl LVIII. I remember telling another Niners fan that like me, your Catholic faith is an important part of your identity. I learned this from my students who were tasked with researching the faith lives of six players on each team for a group assignment in my Sports and Spirituality class. Given your faith-filled conviction and success, I was not surprised that you were chosen to give a commencement address at Benedictine—a Catholic college in Kansas. 

I just completed my 24th year of teaching Religious Studies in a Catholic secondary school setting. I love graduation, baccalaureate mass and more. In fact, I  make a point of watching the commencement address at my alma mater, The University of Notre Dame every year.  Graduation at a Catholic institution allows us to publicly celebrate, profess and share our faith. I value that faith and reason, tradition, and ritual are longstanding, important components of Catholicism.

It is with this context that I came to watch and listen to your speech. I am aware that you received a standing ovation from the Class of 2024 and that 15 women did not join in this enthusiastic gesture. I can assure you I would be one of the fifteen. I would sit and perhaps I would have written what you have before you: this Open Letter. 

One of your themes was a call for graduates to Stay in your lane and accept that lane—a phrase you mentioned four times. You said, "Being locked in with your vocation and staying in your lane is going to be the surest way for you to find true happiness and peace in this life." You prefaced this message by admitting, "I never envisioned myself nor wanted to have this sort of a platform but God has given it to me so I have no other choice but to embrace it and preach more hard truths about accepting your lane and staying in it." 

This message confounded me as I have yet to hear a graduation speech reference this trope. While I think graduation is a time to consider vocation, the notion of staying in one's lane seems contrary to how I understand one's calling. No one gets there alone. We learn from the wisdom, encouragement and example of others. Does that mean I might walk or run in someone else's lane? Maybe.

Graduation is an act of hope. A school confers diplomas with the hope that its graduates will change the world—for the good! I'm not sure I want or need them to "stay in their lane" from that moment on. I also found it confusing that you would offer a message to women, about women, given this lane. 

You said,

For the ladies present today, congratulations on an amazing accomplishment. You should be proud of all that you have achieved to this point in your young lives. I want to speak directly to you briefly because I think it is you, the women, who have had the most diabolical lies told to you, how many of you are sitting here now about to cross the stage, and are thinking about all the promotions and titles you’re going to get in your career. Some of you may go on to lead successful careers in the world. But I would venture to guess that the majority of you are most excited about your marriage and the children you will bring into this world. I can tell you that my beautiful wife Isabelle would be the first to say that her life truly started when she began living her vocation as a wife and as a mother.

On my graduation day, I was not thinking about promotions or future job titles. Nor was I thinking about marriage and children. I know exactly what I was thinking. 

For a few weeks leading up to graduation, I didn't know if I wanted to go to the ceremony. Those who know me will find this quite surprising, for Notre Dame alumna is an outstanding characteristic of my identity. I bleed blue and gold—sometimes, loud...always proud. I thought What difference would my presence in a class of 1800 people make?  I don't know from whence this cynical sentiment came. I am not proud of it. Though honest, this limited view was quickly shattered.

On Sunday, May 19, 1996 I walked into the JACC and I was overwhelmed. The entire atmosphere conferred in me a sense that I had achieved something quite remarkable. I saw my parents and my two siblings. I waved and smiled. They actually have a picture of this moment. To this day, I don't even know how I managed to see them! (pre-cell phones). I am so grateful for that memory because their joy became my joy. Thank you Mom and Dad, Mark and Sarah for being there.

From that moment forward, I remember holding  gratitude in my heart as the Father President, Monk Malloy greeted my classmates and the audience. As I sat and listened to the speeches, I remember feeling sad that this chapter of my life had come to a close. I thought of how much I would miss my friends and professors. I didn't want to leave the campus community I loved so much. I was excited to start in the Alliance for Catholic Education (ACE)  teaching program, but it was at the expense of bidding farewell to what I had known. I did think about vocation, as I had a sense that teaching was my calling. It still is. But according to your message, I am an outlier. I was not among the purported majority who were thinking about my vocation as a wife and a mother. With all due respect, Did I miss my lane? 

Twenty-eight years later, I am still not a wife or a mother. Had you asked me on graduation day if that is something I desired, I would have said "yes." In or around graduation no one at Notre Dame asked me about those aspirations. In no way do I feel slighted, lied to or even misled by this community for not asking that question. 

I have always wanted to get married, I still do. And with the desire to be married, yes, I wanted to be a mother. A friend once asked me, Do you feel called to marriage?  I said "yes." I have always felt called to marriage but I am not married. I get asked why I am not married. I am told that I seem like someone who would be married. I have been told I would be a great mom. Thank you. Others think something is wrong with me because I am not married—I have wondered about this myself. All questions aside, I don't have an answer—for now—to this question. It is a mystery.

Mystery however is a component of our faith. God's ways are not our ways. I accept what is with humility and yet I live in hope. And still, I have felt fulfilled in my career and in my life as an unmarried person. I am not waiting for my life to truly begin. This is not a message that Jesus preached—to the woman at the well, to Mary or Martha, Mary Magdalene or to me.

My sense is that other women share this sentiment. Those include the "founding institution and sponsor of Benedictine College, the sisters of Mount St. Scholastica." Via Facebook, these sisters "responded to the controversial remarks of Harrison Butker as commencement speaker." They wrote

One of our concerns was the assertion that being a homemaker is the highest calling for a woman. We sisters have dedicated our lives to God and God's people, including the many women whom we have taught and influenced during the past 160 years. These women have made a tremendous difference in the world in their roles as wives and mothers and through their God-given gifts in leadership, scholarship, and their careers.

Their message reminds me that for women and for men, there are many paths to holiness. There is no singular call, no certain path to fulfillment. I don't even think there is a your lane or my lane. So why stay in it?

To me, a commencement speaker ought to build rapport with the audience. They should familiarize themselves with the campus community—its traditions and what makes it special. They can offer insight into what they have learned in their lives and share their story. I would have loved to hear  your thoughts on what makes for a great placekicker. How has this role helped you be a better husband, father, brother, son and friend? What are the life lessons that football offers you, your family and the world. Think Sports and Spirituality! (See Roger Federer at Dartmouth for more). For many, the disappointment in your address is as the sisters wrote: "Instead of promoting unity in our church, our nation, and the world, his comments seem to have fostered division,"

Given your passion for your wife's vocation, it would have been interesting to me to hear how having a college degree has made her an excellent homemaker. What did she learn in college that prepared her for the demands of motherhood? With but 2% of the world holding a college diploma, how are the women of Benedictine College endowed with a special responsibility to do what Ignatius of Loyola preached: Go and set the world on fire. Motherhood is a source of fulfillment for countless women—praise God that it is! The world needs wonderful, loving and holy parents—but they are not neceesarily "the fulfilled." I think the Beatitudes speak to who is.

Though your speech was given in mid-May, I felt the need to pen this letter because I recently returned from a service immersion trip to Jerusalem Farms in Kansas City, MO. This week long adventure included chores, urban farming, community building (read: playing cards), prayer, reflection and conversation. Because of the setting, the conversation turned to the Kansas City Chiefs and because J-Farm has religious roots, your commencement address resurfaced. What began as an ardent desire for me to understand how or why his speech resonates with so many people has led to this letter. I wrote it with a sincere desire that you listen to a different point of view. 

Given your lane, I find it ironic that you went after the Bishops in our church. You said, "These men who are present day apostles, our bishops once had adoring crowds of people kissing their rings and taking in their every word, but now relegate themselves to a position of inconsequential existence."  As you know, in today's society, Super Bowl champs are the men who wear rings that people kiss. As you know, many, many people take in your every word. Many will stand in response to that. Others do not—they can't. I wouldn't.

Let us pray that no one in this life be rendered inconsequential. Let us hope that we find fulfillment in many expressions of vocation. Let us love one another, serve one another, and pray for one another, Amen.

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Commencement
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