Moving the Margins: Kinship in Sports....Thank you, Regis Jesuit HS

Talking and writing about women's sports isn't always easy. The fight for equal access, opportunity and attention to the women's game is on-going. It often feels like a battle. While we celebrate over 50 years of Title IX and the efforts that female athletes like Billie Jean King led toward equal pay, the struggle remains real. For example, NIL and its affect on college sports—who is getting the money and why—add a new  and pressing challenge. However, I recently led a conversation on the state of sport for women. My session at Regis Jesuit High School in Denver was one of many dynamic and important breakout sessions at their 20th annual Diversity Day. I left feeling energized and hopeful. I mean it when I said, "it was fun." Victory.

As written on Regis Jesuit's website, 

Our theme for this year comes from the Jesuit Universal Apostolic Preferences #2 and #4: Care for the Common Home / Walking with the Excluded. The theme: “For the Greater Glory of All God’s Diverse Creation” is a call to kinship. To be in Kinship with our community – to recognize that we “belong to each other” is to recognize that we are interconnected.

And that definition drove my title: Moving the margins, Kinship in Sports.

I began with profiling RJ alumna, Fran Belibi '19 to illustrate we really are interconnected. Belibi is the first female high school player in Colorado to dunk the ball during game play. I heard about her because the principal of the school is a close friend and passionate about basketball. Knowing my love of Sports and Spirituality, he shared Belibi's remarkable story. I recommend reading it here.

Not only did she start playing basketball later in life, her parents weren't excited about this idea.  Believe you me when I say her story is atypical, or as she would say "miraculous." Through Fran Belibi, I learned why it's uncommon for women to dunk. I had no idea.

Belibi matriculated to Stanford University. Though I live fairly close to Palo Alto, I don't consider myself to be a fan of the Cardinal. That is, until two of my former students, the Begovich brothers made the men's basketball team. 

Through both Daniel and Neal, I paid more attention to the Stanford hoops. When the women made it to the finals in the 2001 National Championship, Daniel told me specifics about the team. He knew the players and told me how supportive their programs were of one another. Because he cared, I cared. We belong to each other. I have always had great respect for the women's coach, Tara VanDerveer and knowing that one of their players came from Regis Jesuit made it that much more fun to watch and celebrate. We are interconnected. Kinship.

But the story doesn't end here. I took my Sports and Spirituality class on a field to the San Francisco Museum of Modern Art for the exhibit "Get in the Game: Sports, Art and Culture." Upon checking in, we encountered the work of the cartoonist and graphic novelist, Gene Luen Yang. His illustration of "Bay Area Hoops" featured the stories of Steph Curry, Jeremy Lin and Fran Belibi. Reading her panel brought me back to the article that I first read on the Regis Jesuit website, FRAN BELIBI ’19: SUCCESS THROUGH FAITH AND SCIENCE.  It speaks of Love and Basketball—her love of God and ultimately kinship.

During the 45 minute session, I asked the students What makes kinship hard. What gets in the way? Why have we forgotten that we belong to each other. Is it the nature of athletics? Is it fear? Fear that focusing on being with the other will take away from the other? Or, fear that there isn’t enough to go around? 

I said to them, "I want to know, Are we unable to appreciate differences for what they are?" And I wonder, To what degree has our society and everyday norms act as systems of oppression and marginalization?  Might they have had more of an impact than we know/realize?

Student responses were varied and thoughtful. While many spoke to the questions I raised, others mentioned our human nature and the unredeemed part of ourself that put our wants and needs first/at the expense of others.

The shared introspection was meaningful. Although challenging and difficult, we did not conclude the conversation here. I pivoted to two sets of trivia questions. Each one invites some insight into the forces and norms that have challenged interconnection—past and present. Those who were able to answer these questions correctly got a WNBA trading card (I got the idea from this work of art at the SFMoMA exhibit). It was awesome to see how excited they were to receive something shiny, new and interesting!

My next post will include both the answers to these trivia questions and suggestions for how we can move the margins and live out kinship. 

Congratulations to Regis Jesuit for an inspiring, important, inclusive and Diversity Day. This dynamic gathering doesn't happen without the hard work, servant leadership and kinship of the faculty, staff and student body. Go Raiders! 

These questions are True or False:

• During Medieval times (500-1500 AD) women were forbidden from playing in sport. 
• According to historian William Baker, nearly all modern sports have their roots in the play of medieval peasants.
• In the early 20th Century, Catholic Church leaders expressed concern that sports sexualized women’s bodies and that sports could take away from women’s natural role as mothers.
• Pope John Paul II’s teaching on the “Theology of the Body” speaks to a positive appreciation on for the central role of sport, recreation, exercise and play for the  development of a person’s mind and spirit. He proclaimed this as true for women only.

Take a guess:

• Name the two fastest growing sports for females in the U.S.
• Can you name a professional female athlete who is a mom?
• Is Pope Francis a sports fan? If so, of what sport?
• He speaks and write about the Culture of Encounter.  What might this mean in sport?
• Name three WNBA teams. How many are there?

Formula for a Winning Speech: Thank You, Josh Allen

Whether or not you think thank you notes have gone out of style, extending gratitude hasn't. It cannot, nor should it. For those who find writing a thank you note to be a burden—it is. But, taking a larger look at this responsibility allows one to see that the task exists because another person has given you their time, talent or treasure. Whether it's an act of care or generosity that another has extended to you, gifts deserves recognition. The world is a better place because we give and we say "thank you." But the burden need not be a heavy one. How? why? There's a formula—all of five steps—for writing penning such prose. Following a format for a thank you note need not make it insincere. You still have to personalize and put a stamp on it/hit send, but I hope this hack is helpful.

I wish he were playing in today's Super Bowl match up, but this past week Josh Allen was awarded the AP Most Valuable Player award for the first time. Allen was in attendance at NFL Honors in New Orleans to accept the award. He was joined by his fiancée Hailee Steinfeld, his parents as well as his coach, Sean McDermott and the Buffalo Bills' GM Brandon Beane. With 27 first place votes and 383 total points, this prestigious award is well deserved. The Bill's quarterback gave one of the best speeches I have heard from an honoree. 

I don't know that any reader of the blog or I will ever have to give an acceptance speech of this nature, but many of us are put in public places and spaces when and where we must address an award, accomplishment or honor. Should you find yourself in such a sphere, look to Allen's example. Let #17 words serve as your formula for further success. I hope this format helps!

First, watch for yourself. It is but two minutes and 20+ seconds long

• After a moment of awe and appreciation, he acknowledges there are a lot people to thank— and he apologizes in advance if anyone is left out. 
• God—thank the good Lord for allowing one to be in that place (short and sweet)
• Other nominees—he acknowledges the other MVP candidates by name.
• The powers that be—Allen then start at the top, as related to the team: "I'd like to think the Bills organization, Terry and Kim Pegula, Brandon Beane, Sean McDermott, thank you guys for drafting me seven and a half years ago. 
• The team.—Allen says, "I know this is an individual award and it says Most Valuable Player on it, but I think it's derived from team success, and I love my team," I don't know that we can say "I love you" enough. 
• All those who make one's work possible—A wise person knows that great success only happens because as Allen said: “We got such a great locker room in Buffalo, and it takes everybody.” Who doesn't love the shout out to Slick Rick in the mail room.... many hands make light work: literally and metaphorically. Shine on Josh!
• Family—in what was my favorite part of this speech, Allen named his parents and each of his three siblings—who are his favorite, original teammates. They aren't the only ones brought to tears at this point. He added, "I know you take a lot of pride in this as well." He's right. I have a feeling his entire hometown of Firebaugh, just off of Highway 5 in the Central Valley of California does too.
• Fiancée—no doubt, behind every great man is a "rock" and best friend. Beautiful.
• Conclusion—Allen lands his speech with a personal plea—one that is easy to remember, and hard to forget: "Be good, do good. God bless, and Go Bills."

I don't wear gear from other teams or schools. I have a personal policy against wearing a jersey of a player that does not play for my own squad. That being said, Josh Allen has certainly given my own mandate a good run for the money.

The athletic director at school immediately asked me if I was going to blog about this. How could I not? I won't go so far as to say what my classmate and friend, Jim said, "I love him like a son." But, I am a fan. I hope he gets to a future Super Bowl and hoists the Lombardi trophy in the near future. AND I hope this words help many people put in positions of privilege like this one. Congrats 17. Can't wait to yell "MVP!" in Tahoe.

Photo Credits
Quotes from the article
Tahoe
MVP (quotes from here too)

Super Bowl LIX Offers Something For Everyone: Six Insights into this Spirited Sunday

Football fan or not, Super Bowl Sunday offers something for everyone. And teaching about it in Sports and Spirituality through the assignment: Faith and Football, I was reminded of its significance to American culture. We are an interesting, inspiring, complicated, spirited and spiritual nation. We love sport and we love athletes, coaches, and yes, a football game between two divisional rivals gives us insight into who we are and what we value. 

1. Guess who will be in attendance?
Kendall Baker of Yahoo sports reports that "Donald Trump will become the first sitting U.S. president to attend the Super Bowl. Three Vice Presidents have attended: Al Gore (1994), George H.W. Bush (1982) and Spiro Agnew (1971)." Will he wear the #47 jersey given to him by the NHL champion Florida Panthers, who visited the White House this week ahead of their game tonight against the first-place Capitals. 

I was surprised to read that DJT is the first to take a seat in what will be the SuperDome's presidential suite. I told my students "if I were POTUS, I would go every year." Then I realized, I might have obligations that are more pressing. Maybe not.

2. Super Bowl Party Time
In the event you're not sure what to bring to a Super Bowl gathering, I have a party pleaser. I first got the recipe from my friend's sister-in-law. I made them and brought them to class on presentation day. My students liked them so much that one boy actually picked up the entire container and placed it on his desk  He and his friends offered unsolicited praise of these pretzels. I don't even have a name for them, but they are magical.

Use a 16 oz. bag of pretzels, 2/3 cup oil, I pkg. ranch mix, 1 tsp. cayenne and 1 tsp. garlic powder.  

Mix everything except the pretzels and then add the mixture right into the bag of pretzels. I shake them gently to evenly distribute the wet mixture and then put on a cookie sheet or roasting pan. 

Bake at 300 degrees for 20 minutes, stirring once halfway through.

Given that the recipe was given to me, it is only right to give it away to others I'd love to know if you have thoughts on variations of this savory snack. Regardless, enjoy!

3. Pre-game Prayer
Rather than examine the public praise of Christ in the post-game presser, I am ever eager to learn the ways that athletes pray before games. Many athletes engage personally and publicly in prayer as a way to center themselves—and they do so in different ways.

For example, Chiefs quarterback Patrick Mahomes has a ritual. Two hours before every single game Mahomes, an evangelical Christian, walks the field, takes a knee and bows his head at the goal post. Since high school he has made time before the contest to "thank God for those opportunities." He prays,  "In the warmth of your love, will you deport, keep me safe, safe and sound."

Eagles quarterback, Jalen Hurts offers his prayer in private. In a GQ Sports video where Hurts lists 10 things he can’t live without, his daily devotional and his journal were included. In his pregame ritual, he makes time for both. His pregame ritual makes

“It’s really important to me because I’m a man of God. Waking up every morning and having a routine where I can gain some wisdom and learn his Word and just walk by the Spirit. I strive to do that daily, and I challenge myself to spread that Word organically.”

What other ways do the players promote and/or practice their faith? Maybe you will see A.J. Brown wearing his bracelet that says, "I AM SECOND"—meaning that God is first. I appreciate that these three men, like many of their teammates ‘Walk by the Spirit.’ 

4. Spiritual Hero
While it's amusing that Eagles' head coach Nick Sirianni once worked for the Chiefs, and the Chiefs head Coach Andy Reid worked for the Birds, what's more interesting  stood out to me is the personal profile of their assistant running backs coach, Porter Ellet. 

From my students' presentation I learned that the Chiefs "left hand man" was introduced to Coach Reid by his son-in law. Reid was impressed by Ellett’s determination and invited him into the organization in 2017 as a personal assistant, then promoted him in 2020 where he served as an offensive quality control coach (2020-2022). He was promoted to his current position in 2023. 

Ellet Lost use of right arm  in an accident where he fell out of the bed of a moving pickup truck when he was four years old. He fractured his skull and damaged nerves  in his right arm which left it immobile. After 12 years of injuries and struggles living with an immobile arm, Ellet asked his parents if he could get his arm amputated. Although he did not did not play football, he played both baseball and basketball in high school

In 2022 NFL Films, Mahomes said “I know one day he’s going to be a head coach in this league.” That is the right thing to see.

5. Charitable Cause Worth Consideration
As we know sports and the Super Bowl in particular offer a great platform whereby athletes and teams can raise awareness about a cause or charitable organization. For the first time, my students actually showed the video that features one of the competitor's team initiatives.

The Eagles Autism Foundation provides funding for Autism research and awareness. So far the Birds have contributed $8.1 million dollars to fund 53 research and community projects. The video captures who benefits and how with joy and alacrity. See for yourself.

As noted by my student who presented this slide, "I find it inspiring how the organization utilizes its platform to provide awareness, funding, and resources to marginalized communities.I admire their efforts to make an impact and setting an example for many professional teams." Here. Here.

6. Give back!
The word holiday comes from the Old English and meant holy day. While the term was originally used to refer to religious days, today it has a much broader meaning, and refers to secular celebrations as well.  And a great way to gather for any holiday is with traditional foods and a feast like no other. In this way, Super Bowl Sunday does not disappoint. 

In fact, next to Thanksgiving Day, Americans eat more on Super Bowl Sunday than any other day of the year.Over the last few years, about 12.5 million pizza pies have been consumed on Super Bowl Sunday. Chicken wings are another fan favorite. The National Chicken Council estimates that Americans will eat 1.47 billion wings on February 9. This is enough to circle the Earth three times!

A colleague told me "people consume enough avocados to fill a football field three inches high. No idea if that's true or not..." Who doesn't love a good avocado.

While people will double their calorie intake on Sunday, too many Americans will go hungry. Therefore, I ask students to bring in a canned food item for the SF-Marin Food Bank. We can all do our part to end hunger. Maybe you want to make your Super Bowl squares into a 50/50 raffle with proceeds to a local food pantry or soup kitchen. There are so many ways to give to others.

In Conclusion
Whether or not you will be cheering for the reigning champs or against them. It doesn't matter if you are watching for the half time show or the commercials. Super Bowl Sunday is a day for us to come together for snacks, service, to celebrate spiritual heroes, raise questions, express concerns, dream differently and have fun. Enjoy the game.

Photos
Super Bowl LIX
47
Left Hand

    

Let Us Remember....Actions Have Consequences

We begin every prayer with the words "Let us remember." We respond, "That we are in the holy presence of God." I shouldn't need this reminder but I do. And I love it. Taking a moment to remember frames what we do, how we stand and and who we are. And reading MLB bans Yankees fans who interfered with Mookie Betts in 2024 World Series from all ballparks indefinitely reminded me that a second call and response might be helpful for all of us.

"Let us remember: actions have consequences."

They can and they should. 

The two New York Yankees fans who became infamous figures for interfering with Los Angeles Dodgers outfielder Mookie Betts in Game 4 were told “Your conduct posed a serious risk to the health and safety of the player and went far over the line of acceptable fan behavior," said a letter written by MLB to the fans, via The Athletic.

"Based on your conduct, Major League Baseball ('MLB') is banning you indefinitely from all MLB stadiums, offices, and other facilities," the letter continued. "You are also hereby banned indefinitely from attending any events sponsored by or associated with MLB. Please be advised that if you are discovered at any MLB property or event, you will be removed from the premises and subject to arrest for trespass."

To only send a message about the severity of this event is not enough. The stark consequence it sets a standard. MLB has spoken: we stand behind the integrity of the game and ensuring the well-being of our players. Even fans have a responsibility and that is to respect the rules. 

Most likely, the public will not know if Austin Capobianco and John P. Hansen adhere to this ban. But, we do know further actions and consequences will follow. Unfortunately, this is not entirely a deterrent for all. 

I was shocked to read that the Timberwolves' Anthony Edwards has been fined five times this season by the league—which has now docked him $285,000 for the infractions. The article reports that the AntMan flashed a middle finger at a game official during an inbounds play in the T-wolves' loss to the Memphis Grizzlies.

In November he was fined $35,000 for flashing a middle finger at a fan in Sacramento. In December he drew three fines - of $25,000 for swearing during a media interview, of $75,000 for using profane language and criticizing game officials, and of $100,000 for swearing during a post-game television interview.

Yes, emotions run hot and high for players and coaches, but they must be kept in check. A zero tolerance policy for how the players treat the officials is essential (in all professional sports). Young people mimic what they see. Clearly the consequences that impact his financial status are not working. Perhaps the league and the players association (NBPA) ought to convene.

Actions and consequences in no way preclude forgiveness—a core Christian value. From time to time however people interpret forgiveness to mean that no matter what we do—how we may have hurt or harmed another—all is okay. I hear quite often "As Catholics, aren't we called to forgive and love everyone?" To me this question is short sighted. We are called to love our neighbors as ourselves. We are asked to forgive seven times 70. Yes AND that doesn't mean that justice bears no responsibility. Reconciliation is never without price. Actions have consequences. This builds the common good. We need this reminder. (The post Ricky Pearsall and Marcus Freeman Choose Hard is about forgiveness).

Today I handed out a detention to two freshman students who continued to talk throughout the Fine Arts Assembly. I gave them a warning and moved to sit next to them. They continued to chat. I couldn't ignore my responsibility to the performers, the other students and to them. I told them they would be meeting with the deans and going to detention. When the show ended, one girl reached out and said "should we wait here?" and then she introduced herself. She apologized. I said "I gave you a chance to change your behavior. It's okay to chat during the breaks but if everyone is talking during the performance as you did, none of us could hear it." They apologized. It was so civil and respectful. Action. Consequence. Lesson learned? Not sure but all parties know what's expected and trust we will be better for it. Let us remember that too...

Photo Credits
AntMan
Fan Duel
Quote

Content before Connection: Lesson from the 2025 AT&T Pebble Beach Pro-Am

Walking the course at Spyglass Hill, one of two golf venues that host the AT&T Pebble Beach Pro-Am, I turned to my friend Charlie and asked him, "Do you always connect with people?" The man talks to every third volunteer and patron. At one point Charlie cracked a great joke with one of the players's wives. Everyone is fair game. He told me, "I just want to make people laugh. If I can get a chuckle from them, that's a good day." I said "I had a student who once told me his goal was to make another person smile. Everyday. Those are two great goals."

Whether is a laugh, snort or a smile, connecting with other people is not something I take for granted. The effort and attempt to reach out to others makes the world a better place...a warmer place...it's more interesting too. And attending the 2025 AT&T Pro-Am reminded me it's both an art and science. I think it's worth consideration and further reflection. Here's what came up for me.

For many people, reaching out to a stranger/someone new is a bit of a risk. Therefore, I think it's important to connect with others in a way that is comfortable for you—reflective of your personal style. For me, this means content before connection. Whether it's at the American Century Championship in Lake Tahoe, AT&T Pebble Beach Pro Am or at my own club—I like to offer an observation, insight or information as my way of connecting. 

One might not need any content to connect when it's this beautiful out....

For example, when I stood near Jay Bilas on the 14th hole at the American Century Championship, I brought up an anecdote from his book "Toughness." A friend had given me the book to read and I finished it—not for the purpose of connecting with the Duke basketball star turner announcer, but because I wanted to learn if one can coach toughness. While I did not mention that question, I did say I couldn't believe the story about the game he played after having his wisdom teeth out. We both laughed. I met Charlie and my own goal in that space!

Other connections are born from observations about a person. For instance, walking off the 13th green, the crowd surrounded Stephen Curry hoping for an autograph or photo. He had to pause and wait for the ropes to clear so he could proceed to the next tee box. I said "Steph! What? no mouth guard?!" He looked at me out of the corner of his eye. He laughed and smiled. My student would have been proud. The Warriors great gave me a smile, but another NBA star, Chris Webber might have one of the most electric smiles I've seen. Rather than give a nod to his success at Michigan with yet another "Go Blue!" I told my friend to comment on his megawatt smile. He was so moved he gladly took a picture with her to show off those pearly whites.

Harrison Smith is known by his teammates at ND as "Hayseed."
Inside Irish is always a good point of connection

And one of my all time favorite connections was born from a conversation I did not even have with Aaron Rodgers. I chronicled that exchange in the post: Lessons in Leadership: The Importance of The Table, Thank you, Aaron Rodgers. Thanks to the Netflix series: Enigma, I already know what I want to say to him this year. 

Content before Connection isn't for everyone. You might have your own way of relating to others. And in no way is it a fail proof way of connecting. For example, although we followed the English golfer Justin Rose for 13 holes, I didn't have anything special to say. This was unfortunate as we had ample time and space to connect and I had seen the show "Full Swing!"  Furthermore, content before connection can be a challenge when what I know or am thinking about isn't exactly positive. I didn't want to bring up how astonishing it is to me that Alex Smith, the retired quarterback and first round draft choice of the San Francisco 49ers, was 9-13 in his first three seasons with the team. In fact, he didn't play half of the games. No one wants to connect over that! I have to think this is where a smile is sufficient.

As a teacher in a Jesuit school, I have been formed to focus on connection before content. The Ignatian Pedagogical Paradigm urges teachers to walk through the student's door. The program suggests that all learning is . . .

• Situated in a specific context 
• Rooted in previous experience and the result of new learning experiences.
  
  
  

Our job is to find out how that relates and connects to the lives of our students and go from there. I find this to be a valuable framework for teaching and for learning....but outside the classroom—this past weekend—I was reminded there might be other ways of proceeding. In the meantime, I would like to offer a few questions for your personal consideration.

• How do you connect with other people? What approach works for you?
• Do you have a goal to brighten another person's day? make them laugh? smile? 
• What do you know, think or see that might be meaningful, unique or fun for another person to hear? 

I think taking on an approach that works for you puts you on the path toward connection. Something we all need. 

Photo Credits
Celebs
IPP

Sign Value: As seen from Notre Dame and Penn State Football

When students walk into my classroom in a shirt and tie, or wearing their varsity jacket, I take notice. That simple gesture of coming to school in formal attire sends a message of its own: it's game day. I like that they make the effort to dress up and make it known that today isn't just another day. That tradition invites questions and sparks conversation. Who are you playing today? Where is the game? How are you feeling— nervous? Excited? How are the Lancers this year? Beat the Bells! 

Sign value goes a long way.

Earlier this week, I paused when I realized that one of my students—a varsity athlete— came to class sans tie. Fifteen minutes prior, I saw one of his teammates in game day gear. Somewhat surprised and slightly confused, I asked him, "Why aren't you wearing a tie?" He said "my coach doesn't care if we wear one or not." I don't know his coach well enough to find out if this is true. I replied "But you're a senior, and, you're a starter. Don't you care?" 

Sign value speaks for itself.

James Martin, SJ writes about sign value. "Sign value" refers to the meaning or significance a particular object, action, or event holds as a visible representation of a deeper spiritual truth or message. Sign value acts as a marker or indicator pointing towards more...something beyond. In a religious context, it's important for sign value enables people to connect with their faith through concrete symbols, tangible objects and more.

Fans loved who Charles Du included his name...

Catholic spirituality finds sign value in and outside of church—in the day to day as well as time and space which is sacred and holy. Sign value is important because we are always seeking to convene and connect, understand and make known who we are and what we value. Sign value allows us to anchor those truths. For an athlete to wear a tie or a varsity jacket might seem nominal, but it's a place to start—and that is not to be underestimated. 

Sign value can shape a community and define it. And good leaders recognize its import.

Every coach (and leader) needs examples to call out and credit. They need tried and tested ways that work. It helps to call on cases that demonstrate what they value and who they want to be. For instance, the Notre Dame football team does not put surnames of on the back of a player's jersey. The rationale for this tradition is that the team is important; the name of that team is what matters, and that can be found on the  front of the jersey only. 

Notice what the post-season brought...for one team.

To be honest, I don't like this practice. I don't want to look to a roster after every play. Sure, during the course of the season we learn the names and numbers of certain players— but there are so many athletes go unrecognized because of tradition. Sign value isn't always convenient or comfortable, but it speaks volumes. A coach can say that the team is what matters most, but what can they point to sends this message? What can they name that reveals this truth? Notre Dame football can include this simple gesture as one example. 

Notre Dame isn't the only program with this practice. The Nittany Lions of Penn State do the same. And during the Orange Bowl, I couldn't help notice, they kept this tradition whereas the Irish did not. (In both the Shamrock Series as well as post-season play, Notre Dame adds names to the jerseys. I have to wonder if the players love it. I know I do). I want to give credit where credit is due. Whether it's season or postseason—Penn State can say they hold sign value in the same way. To Coach Franklin, I would say: you—the team—know who you are and what you're about. I applaud you for that. This is not a criticism of Notre Dame; I appreciate both ways of holding sign value.

to their credit...

For Notre Dame, I can point to other examples that signify the importance of team over individual performance. In April 2017, the University installed its first major video display system in Notre Dame Stadium. What fans, players and coaches were privy to see changed dramatically. And yet, no one will see individual profiles our promos. The focus remains on the team. That's sign value of the digital kind. 

Whether is wearing a tie on game day or not wearing your name on your jersey, what we wear, carry, promote and portray has significance. It's not just something on the surface. It offers sign value, and sign value invites us to consider something more. This is the space the spiritual life is always inviting us into...

Photo Credits
Mix
Unrivaled
Du
No Names

The Philosphy of Being a (Notre Dame) Fan

The College Football playoffs have brought much more than a new format to the post season. This pathway to the National Championship has yielded incredible television ratings, surprising match-ups, exciting games and for me, questions about the philosophy of being a fan.

Given the time, mental energy, money and attention students, alumni and friends give to a team, it might be worth asking How does being an avid fan fit into living a good life? Fortunately, the University has given us a resource to help us answer this question.

Philosophy professor Meghan Sullivan shares that there are many ways that being a fan of a sports team … say a football team … is a good thing because it promotes the virtues that contribute to leading a meaningful life. Watch and see for yourself. 

What this short lesson doesn't touch on however is the how and why people root for a certain team. This fascinates me. For example, a woman at my gym said "I know you are cheering for ND but I want Penn State to win. My son-in-law's family went to school there. He didn't. Regardless, now we are pulling for them." I just listened. A colleague informed me he could not cheer for the Irish because his nephew plays for Ohio State. I said "oh your brother Brian has a son on the team? Wow!" "No," he said. "It's Brian's wife's brother's son." Although I wanted to say "that seems like a loose definition of nephew," I just listened. The truth is, fandom is totally up for grabs. It's up to an individual to decide who they like and who they don't, who they will follow and accordingly, who becomes a rival. I have followed what I believe to be a fairly conventional path to fandom. Others? not so much.

I am a fan of my local, Bay Area sports teams: Niners, Giants and Warriors. With the rise of professional women's sports, I anticipate adding the Valkyries to my dossier. I have grown up a fan of these squads and remain loyal to them as well as my high school and collegiate alma maters. 

I don't wear gear representing other teams or players. When I visited the Duke bookstore last January, I was reminded that I have no interest in wearing a shirt from a school I did not attend. I won't go so far as to say I will never do that, but in general I abide by this code of conduct. 

NLDS Game in 2014

I have cheered for other teams when my own teams are eliminated from post season play and as written about before, I found myself cheering for my rival—the Los Angeles Dodgers to beat the New York Yankees last fall in order to win a bet. #NotProud. The increased (and mostly positive attention) around Notre Dame has caused me to consider the path to fandom further. I have a personal ethic about sports fandom and wonder about it for other people. While Sullivan points out some moral quandaries that arise with regards to sports fandom, other questions remain. 

For example, I grew up in a family that loves Notre Dame football. My paternal grandfather was born and raised in South Dakota. A devout Catholic, he played the game at So Dakota State University and coached the sport for years. Choosing to follow Notre Dame—a Catholic university in the midwest was an easy choice. I'm grateful it was one that was passed down to me. Go Irish. 

My parents never pressured me to go to Notre Dame. When I was a student,, they were proud of me but it did not define them. They tell me they looked for me on television for four years, to no avail. Truth is, they were watching games long before my time in South Bend and long after—but I love this story nonetheless. 

My Dad and I outside of Farley Hall, senior year.

They were able to make it back to campus for one game a season. Yes, even in my day some parents and families made it back for every home game. Many live within driving distance and have their own friends and family to see on game day. I have however wanted to ask some parents: Do you or does your child go to Notre Dame? Fandom doesn't always reveal the best in me.

Fans can be judgy and territorial. I have thought to myself at other sporting events or experiences: this doesn't compare to "x." or If they only knew "y." While that may be true, Why not let fans have their own experience...and create their own memories? Our loyalties run strong and deep. They often reveal who we are and what we value. For example, I've never understood why a person—not from Oakland or Los Angeles—would choose to follow the Raiders. I mean, I know why...but I don't understand it. 

Nor do understand the fan who cheers for their grad school louder and prouder than their undergraduate institution. This seems to happen quite regularly with Notre Dame. It's strange to me  because undergraduate life is such a defining part of the Notre Dame experience. Its four years and students live in the dorms on campus. Sure I'm happy they like the Irish, but it feels different. For example, I have a friend who was enrolled in the one year program for his MBA. The man wears more ND/talks more about ND than he does about the University of Oregon and his four years in Eugene. If we had played the Ducks, that would have been really interesting. 

Another friend added that he cheers for Michigan because he got into grad school there. While that must have been an honor to be accepted to the program, I found that to be a loose tie to fandom. I said "well I was wait-listed at Duke. Do I cheer for them half the time?" His collegiate alma mater dropped its football program so he became a man without a college football team. He is not alone. He chose Stanford—a local school he did not attend, and he became a season ticket holder. I respect that. In short, I get it when your undergraduate school no longer has a football team or never did. Otherwise, this is an elusive ethic to me.

I will say, it's been a wonderful time to be a Notre Dame fan. SO many people are wishing us well and have delighted in the story of this season. Our head coach, Marcus Freeman is universally admired and respected. Truly, he is beloved. At times, it's felt disarming to have such great support. Yes, I still hear the unsolicited remarks like the one I heard on Friday. "Your team isn't very good. I don't think they have a chance against OSU. To me the real championship game was the semi-final." I didn't really know what to say. Even if I felt that way, I'm not sure I would say words like those to a fan about their own team. But, I sure as heck have questioned their credibility, let alone their sanity and potentially their humanity. Such is the nature of sports fandom. Furthermore, it's neve been easier to get dressed in the morning. I have a license to wear my ND gear and as the Alumni Association has called fans to do: #paintthetown green. Done and done.

I followed Dr. Sullivan's and Augustine's advice and put my loves in right order. I won't be in attendance at in Atlanta. I just wasn't able to find a ticket for under $1125 each for me and my crew. Those would have cost $1750 each with fees—and that was early in the week! Instead, I'll join others at the San Francisco Alumni Club's official game watch at Chief Sullivans—Irish fans of all types. We will wake up the echoes and cheer cheer for old Notre Dame, one and all. AND regardless of the outcome, we have already won.

We have won so much to have been a part of this journey. Thank you, Notre Dame. Thank you to my Grandfather for forging the fan connection. Thank you to the athletes, coaches and all who make football work. Go Irish.

Photo Credits
Green Fans
Coach Free and Athletes

Ricky Pearsall and Marcus Freeman Choose Hard

Sports fans know that Notre Dame football players hit a sign that says "Play Like a Champion Today" before entering the stadium. But Coach Freeman wants his team to see another sign. It's message if simple and it's clear: Choose Hard. It's a motto that does not pertain only to sports or to school at Notre Dame. It speaks to spirituality, too. 

I want a sign when you walk into this building that says "choose hard" cause when you walk in Notre Dame football, you got to have that mindset. We're going to choose hard today in practice. Choose hard today in meetings.  Choose hard today in a weight room. But we expanded that to what Notre Dame's about. Why? You're going to be challenged in the classroom. As a football player you're going to be in class with some of the most intelligent people in this world and it's difficult. Ultimately you're telling them you want this. Long term you want this. And so you got to choose it. Choose hard.

Given the success of the 2024 season, it's safe to say this team did choose it. After losing to NIU in what was its first loss as a top-five team against an unranked opponent since 2002—choosing hard wasn't just an option, it was necessary. The result? The Irish won the next eleven games and are looking to complete their mission—a hard one: to win the national championship. Let's hope that choosing hard wins.

In the spiritual life, it does too. How? What might that mean?

Look no further than Niners wide receiver, Ricky Pearsall. In an article entitled "Forgiveness wins," I came to learn that Pearsall, chose hard as he reflected upon the armed robbery attempt that nearly cost him his life. Kendall Baker of Yahoo! Sports reported:

Forty Niners rookie Ricky Pearsall was shot in the chest in San Francisco on August 31. The first round draft pick missed  six games from resulting injuries. On Monday, January 6 he was asked to reflect on the attempted robbery that upended his first yera in the league and nearly cost him his life.

His response: I don't know where [the kid who shot him] came from, what environment he grew up in, how he grew up. So I can't judge him as a man just based off one action that he made, as violent as it was.

God forbid him doing that to somebody else. I don't ever want that to happen. But for me … I have to be able to forgive him … At some point, I do want to talk to the kid [and] if I can create an impact on him in any way, I think that would be really big. I'd definitely be open to doing that.

If you struggle with forgiveness, you're not alone. Forgiveness is hard. Personally, I think it takes a lot of courage to forgive someone who has wronged you, hurt you and harmed you. It's very natural to hold on to anger. It's not unnatural to want to retaliate. But Jesus preaches otherwise. His message is loud and it's clear: love your enemies and forgive others.  

Pearsall is a devout Christian. I don't know him but wonder if his faith and its core values is what led to this beautiful response. I appreciate that he has empathy for this young man—he doesn't know his background or personal circumstances. I admire his humility—he doesn't want this to happen to another person. I value his wisdom—he admits forgiveness is something he must do.

Pearsall doesn't owe him anything. His desire to speak to him and his openness to that encounter is inspiring and it's hard. I think that would take courage, too.

“Everything in life requires courage. Whether it is playing football or coaching football; crossing the room to ask a woman on a date or rekindling a love that has grown cold; whether it’s your first day at school or your first day back at school after twenty years; starting a new business, battling a potentially fatal disease, getting married, struggling to overcome an addiction, or sitting humbly with your God in prayer—life requires courage. It’s a prerequisite. Courage brings us to life and makes everything else possible.  I think he could add forgiving another person and being forgiven does too.

Kelly concludes "So, what are we waiting for? You only get one shot at life. What would you do if you weren’t so afraid? Whatever it is, take one small step toward it today, then take another step toward your hopes and dreams tomorrow. Life favors the courageous. So, summon a little courage. You will be amazed what life will give you in return for a little bit of courage. "

Maybe that means you decide to "choose hard" at work or in a relationship. Perhaps it means you "choose hard" and forgive a person. It might be one of the toughest things for a person to to do...but it's a choice. Forgiveness does not mean that the wrong is right, or that a person ought not face justice and proper consequence. It does however mean that we can do something so much bigger than ourselves and choose hard, and choose to forgive. 

Photo Credits
Ricky P

Notre Dame Corner Back Christian Gray's Vision Board: Mission and Blessing

Although I have taken down my tree, wrapped up all the lights and come to terms with the fact that the Christmas season is over, the sights and sounds of a Happy New Year remain. The crowded gym is ample evidence that many resolve to exercise more and make this their healthiest year yet. Even seven days later, folks still greet one another with "Happy New Year." I have heard talk of one words themes and 25 goals for 2025. Thanks to Notre Dame cornerback, Christian Gray, I have one more task to offer in the zeitgeist of new year invitations and opportunities. Create a vision board—sports and spirituality style.

In Season 1, Episode 6: Win and You're In, Gray—a resident of Knott Hall welcomes the camera into his dorm room. After meeting his dragon lizard named Bahati—an African word for blessed—Gray states "I keep everything in my life blessed, and filled with God." That truth is evidenced in the vision board that hangs on the wall. He adds, "my mom and I make a vision board every year. This is all the vision that God has given me. I put it as my mission to live out this entire vision." 

That vision includes reminders and realizations, words, tasks, directives and more. The 2024 vision board includes the following:

• Smile
• Be nicer to yourself
• Create
• Serious Strength
• The Power of Restraint
• I turned my passion into a career
• Gold
• #1 in the Country
• A Calm aof Discipline
• A New Chapter
• Found
• Clean
• Brave Warrior 
• Encouraging
• Top 10
• Be ready
• 1 Corinthians 9

I wonder what vision God has given Christian for 2025. I wonder who supports him in this mission to live out that vision. I want to know in what ways does Notre Dame football—teammates, coaches and staff challenge, encourage, assist and augment that vision...that mission.

Christian Gray is a valuable contributor to a team that has clear goals and remains united in their mission: to win a national championship. He caught the first of two pick-sixes in the Irish win over USC. He has earned the nickname "The Franchise." He concludes his profile piece in Here Come the Irish with the words, "I'm up here. I'm starting now. I'm playing. It's just really a blessing." The audience sees him kneeling in prayer. I can't help but think of the blessing that his testimony has offered. I think we should all consider what vision God has for us in this new year. Let it be your resolution, your one word theme, your mission. Amen.

We Hold Both: An Irish Reflection on Events of the 2025 Sugar Bowl

Every era presents new challenges, new opportunities and new words! For example, we emerged from COVID with hard truths, lessons learned and a vocabulary that still lingers. Buzz words like amplify, pivot, leverage and optimize became daily directives a la Zoom. We learned what it means to "hold space" for people and we did. We still do. And early events of 2025 asked me to do something similar yet different: hold both.

In the early hours of New Year's Day 2025, Shamsud-Din Jabbar drove a truck at a high speed into a crowd on Bourbon Street in New Orleans LA. Fifteen people died in the process, including Jabbar, who was 42 years old. The loss of life, the injury, damage is utterly tragic. Deemed an "act of terrorism," this put local, state and federal authorities on alert and in action. Necessary decisions were made to keep the public safe and "out of harms way." That term is not COVID jargon. It prompted a prudent, solvent course of action: to postpone the Sugar Bowl. The College Football quarterfinal playoff game was scheduled for the following day

Twenty hours later, following an extended moment of silence in the pregame ceremonies, the contest between the University of Georgia and the University of Notre Dame began. The Fightin' Irish, with a season record of 11-1 and ranked #7 prevailed over the #2 team— winning the game 23-10. As my friend and classmate Alex Montoya '96 wrote, "It has been a year of exorcising ghosts, from the specter of the NIU loss to winning our first major bowl game since 1994. There is one more left, of course: winning the national championship in football for the first time since 1988." Victory tasted bittersweet. Here's why...

I can't speak for the people who were at the game, but among my family of fellow ND fans and friends, we all were aware that within a 48 hour period, there were conflicting emotions: shock, awe, and sadness followed by joy, elation and jubilee. And, we know the truth and reality that one event takes precedence over the other.  No athletic contest can account for the loss of lives and the damage has been done. Nor should it. Ever. And yet....we hold both.

We hold both. We can and we do. We have and we will. Now. Today. Tomorrow. Forever.

I would like to be so bold as to proclaim that as Catholics, to hold both is part of our tradition. I say this because it is evidenced through Catholic ritual and tradition. It characterizes the sentiments and even the structure of them. For example, when a loved one dies we gather as a community of faith for the Rite of Christian Burial. This includes a Requiem Mass as well as the Rite of Committal. A dear friend, recently shared "The Work of Christmas: Choir Edition," a reflection on this tradition whether its for 100 people or one other person. Difficult, yet important and... beautiful. 

Today, many people opt for just the celebration of life, but the exercise of walking down the aisle and publicly grieving is an important process. It is a path we all must take, a walk that is unique to no one. We can't make it alone. To ritualize it makes it possible.

You need not be Irish to know that what follows a funeral isn't just the burial. Loved ones, family and friends gather for food and fellowship. For Catholics, much more than a "fifth" of whiskey or a box of Franzia is in store. We share stories and post pictures. We celebrate. We remember. We hold both. 

Though many young Catholics are opting to marry outside of the Church, I find there is a wisdom to the ritual and rite of Holy Matrimony. The ceremony in the Church speaks to the solemn, sacred and sacramental nature of this decision and commitment. It is not without cost. It is a significant day in the life of two people, their family and friends. The formality of the church service—the profession of nuptial vows are to be heard and supported by many more than just two people. We can and should pray for one another—for the two who have become one and their future. Following this service, the bride and groom, the wedding party and all those in attendance partake in a ritualized celebration. Some cultures, other traditions make the most of the reception—as they should! We hold both.

Before the game, the chaplain of the Notre Dame football team, Father Nate Wills, C.S.C. gives to a player a medal of a Catholic saint. He offers a reflection on the significance of this holy person's life and what their example might offer for each athlete on game day. The day after the Irish victory, Father Nate shared with Irish faithful a little bit about the game day saint and that we can continue to pray to St. Sebastian for all athletes and the people of New Orleans. 

Holding today’s medal is a player who had an incredible play at ND’s 23-10 Quarterfinal CFP victory over Georgia. Jayden Harrison is a graduate transfer from Marshall and ran back the 2nd half kickoff for a 98 yard touchdown!

An elite soldier, courageous martyr, and faithful Christian, St. Sebastian is among the most beloved saints in the history of the Church. Born in the late 3rd century, he was a soldier in the Roman army who became a Christian. 

Sebastian secretly aided fellow Christians, providing them with support and encouragement during Emperor Diocletian’s brutal persecution of Christians. He was eventually discovered, arrested, and executed with a barrage of arrows. Miraculously, he survived and was nursed back to health by a fellow Christian, St. Irene.

After he recovered, Sebastian neither cowered in fear nor abandoned his faith. Instead, he boldly confronted Emperor Diocletian, urging him to stop persecuting Christians. This act of courage ultimately led to his second arrest and execution, where he was beaten to death with clubs around the year 286 AD.

St. Sebastian’s legacy is one of resilience and unwavering faith in the face of adversity. He is depicted on this holy medal as a young man tied to a tree and pierced by arrows. He is the patron saint of athletes and soldiers. 

May St. Sebastian’s resiliency and faith inspire the people of New Orleans who are still enduring the aftermath of the Bourbon Street attack on New Year’s. May the Lord bring the victims into his loving arms, comfort their family and friends, protect our police officers and soldiers, and bring peace to our hurting world. 

We hold both: sports and spirituality. Through sports and spirituality, we learn that an athlete held a medal who honors the patron saint of athletes—knowing that one hand is heavy and the other is not. One is solemn. One is celebratory. This same medal is used to remind us to pray for the protection of the people of New Orleans as well as the players on the field. Don't pivot. No need to leverage one hand at the expense of the other. We have created space. We hold both.

Photo Credits
Medals
Tears
Kneeling
Signage