Letter to a Rival: Thank you Roger and Thank you Rafa

One assignment in my Ethics class requires students to write a "Call to Action" letter to an organization or a particular politician. In addition to a grade, my students receive a envelope and a stamp. I don't know why it continues to surprise me, but for the past twenty years I have had to teach high school students how to format and address the letter. They cry, "No one writes letters anymore!"  I pause. "That's interesting. I wrote Joe's college letter of recommendation two weeks ago." They respond "Those are different." "Are they? I ask. "Seems like there is a message that is delivered in the written form." While we may not use pen to paper, letters are not a thing of the past. We write cards and send text messages. We author thank you notes and pour out or hearts with love letters. And today, I read a new one: a love letter to a rival.

Letters in sports aren't uncommon. Upon his retirement Michael Jordan scripted a love letter to basketball; so did Kobe. When Barry Zito left the San Francisco Giants, he took out a full page in the San Francisco Chronicle that featured his letter of gratitude to the fans. I love when athletes think to do this. Earlier this year, I wrote about a letter from John Fisher, the owner of the Oakland A's. I read this "great work of fiction" to my class and much to my surprise, I got choked up. Letters are both personal and private, sometimes public, often revelatory.

As written in The Athletic, "Roger Federer says Rafael Nadal made him “enjoy the game even more” as the Spaniard retires from tennis at the Davis Cup in Malaga, Spain this week.

Federer, who retired alongside Nadal at the 2022 Laver Cup, opened a letter in tribute to his great rival with the salient fact of their rivalry: “You beat me — a lot. More than I managed to beat you.” The letter, in its entirety is here:

Vamos, @RafaelNadal

As you get ready to graduate from tennis, I’ve got a few things to share before I maybe get emotional.

Let’s start with the obvious: you beat me—a lot. More than I managed to beat you. You challenged me in ways no one else could. On clay, it felt like I was stepping into your backyard, and you made me work harder than I ever thought I could just to hold my ground. You made me reimagine my game—even going so far as to change the size of my racquet head, hoping for any edge. 

 I’m not a very superstitious person, but you took it to the next level. Your whole process. All those rituals. Assembling your water bottles like toy soldiers in formation, fixing your hair, adjusting your underwear... All of it with the highest intensity. Secretly, I kind of loved the whole thing. Because it was so unique—it was so you. And you know what, Rafa, you made me enjoy the game even more. 

OK, maybe not at first. After the 2004 Australian Open, I achieved the #1 ranking for the first time. I thought I was on top of the world. And I was—until two months later, when you walked on the court in Miami in your red sleeveless shirt, showing off those biceps, and you beat me convincingly. All that buzz I’d been hearing about you—about this amazing young player from Mallorca, a generational talent, probably going to win a major someday—it wasn’t just hype.

We were both at the start of our journey and it’s one we ended up taking together. Twenty years later, Rafa, I have to say: What an incredible run you’ve had. Including 14 French Opens—historic! You made Spain proud... you made the whole tennis world proud.

I keep thinking about the memories we’ve shared. Promoting the sport together. Playing that match on half-grass, half-clay. Breaking the all-time attendance record by playing in front of more than 50,000 fans in Cape Town, South Africa. Always cracking each other up. Wearing each other out on the court and then, sometimes, almost literally having to hold each other up during trophy ceremonies.

I’m still grateful you invited me to Mallorca to help launch the Rafa Nadal Academy in 2016. Actually, I kind of invited myself. I knew you were too polite to insist on me being there, but I didn’t want to miss it. You have always been a role model for kids around the world, and Mirka and I are so glad that our children have all trained at your academies. They had a blast and learned so much—like thousands of other young players. Although I always worried my kids would come home playing tennis as lefties.

And then there was London—the Laver Cup in 2022. My final match. It meant everything to me that you were there by my side—not as my rival but as my doubles partner. Sharing the court with you that night, and sharing those tears, will forever be one of the most special moments of my career.

Rafa, I know you’re focused on the last stretch of your epic career. We will talk when it’s done. For now, I just want to congratulate your family and team, who all played a massive role in your success. And I want you to know that your old friend is always cheering for you, and will be cheering just as loud for everything you do next. 

Rafa that!

Best always, your fan, 
Roger

Wimbledon 2008: largely considered to be one of the greatest matches every played.

Ever gracious, it's not surprising that King Fed would recognize his chief rivals' success against him. However, what surprised me was his appreciation of Rafa's superstitions. Those ticks. The OCD? I found Nadal's rituals and his ways hard to watch on television. At times I would even look away from the camera until I knew the ball was in play. Rather than stand in judgment (I'm good at that) Fed said "I kind of loved the whole thing. Because it was so unique—it was so you." Tan bonito.

And still, Federer raises the bar by congratulating not just Rafa, but "your family and team, who all played a massive role in your success."  Both men know tennis may be an individual sport but no one does it alone. The Nadal family name and even the people of Mallorca have a right to share in the celebration of this legend.

In my post "The 60 Minutes Interview of Rafael Nadal: Simply Beautiful," Wertheim asks Rafa is he ever gets interviewed without a question about King Fed. "Do you ever get tired of being asked about Roger?" He responds "No. Encantado."  Which means, it is my pleasure. Que rico, Rafa.

I am grateful that one of tennis' greats took the time to share his sentiments and honor his greatest rival in the form of missive. He models for us an important and timeless action. In order to write a letter, one must reflect upon another person and consider why you care about them and what they mean to you. With a public or open letter, we the fans received a small window into something we saw develop often twenty years time. And as Proverbs 27 proclaims, As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another. Sports fans around the world were witnesses to one man becoming better both on and off the court because of a shared love, a shared game: tennis.  Rivals? Yes. Friends? Amen.

Photo Credits
Walking
2008
Today

Criticism or Player Accountability? That is the Question

With all due respect to Kyle Shanahan, and I mean that, I have to wonder: If Deebo Samuel had played for John Wooden, would he have treated Jake Moody differently?

I ask this question because the Hall of Fame UCLA men's basketball coach, John Wooden had but three rules for his team. 

1. Be on time: being punctual showed respect for his players' time.
2. No profanity: to use foul language was to relinquish control. He believed it allowed your opponent to know they had gotten inside your head.
3. Never criticize a teammate: to do so doesn't build up a team but puts on member against another. 

Wooden's intention was to create an environment where respect and loyalty were given and received. The poignancy and simplicity of his three rules provided a foundation—a place for players to stand. His players knew what was expected and what would not be tolerated. Any coach knows that rules can and will be broken. And, still the question crossed my mind: Would things be different? 

For context, As written on the Ninerswire:

Tempers flared on the San Francisco 49ers’ sideline during the team’s 23-20 win over the Tampa Bay Buccaneers on Sunday.

After kicker Jake Moody missed his third kick, wide receiver Deebo Samuel had some words for the 49ers’ second-year kicker. Long snapper Taybor Pepper wasn’t happy with whatever Samuel had to say, and got in the receiver’s face. Samuel responded by striking Pepper in the throat. 

There was more yelling between the two players, but no further physical escalation.

Though it's not clear precisely what Deebo said, one thing is: he criticized his teammate. Deebo let frustration get the best of him. Yes, football is an incredibly emotional game. No one will question Deebo's commitment to giving the very best and the most of himself to it. What he puts his body through week after week after week is tremendous. But, Deebo is just one a member of a 53-man roster. No single player can win the game alone. This same message is found in Scripture.

Saint Paul wasn't writing to a football team but in his letter to the people of Corinth speaks to One Body, Many Parts. He writes

As a body is one though it has many parts, and all the parts of the body, though many, are one body, so also Christ. 

Now the body is not a single part, but many. If a foot should say, “Because I am not a hand I do not belong to the body,” it does not for this reason belong any less to the body. Or if an ear should say, “Because I am not an eye I do not belong to the body,” it does not for this reason belong any less to the body.  If the whole body were an eye, where would the hearing be? If the whole body were hearing, where would the sense of smell be? But as it is, God placed the parts, each one of them, in the body as he intended. If they were all one part, where would the body be? But as it is, there are many parts, yet one body. The eye cannot say to the hand, “I do not need you,” nor again the head to the feet, “I do not need you.”  Indeed, the parts of the body that seem to be weaker are all the more necessary. May  there be no division in the body, but that the parts may have the same concern for one another.If [one] part suffers, all the parts suffer with it; if one part is honored, all the parts share its joy.

To criticize a teammate to dishonor them. There is no way that a professional athlete wants to NOT make the catch, play or kick. Rather than tearing a teammate down, it is important to build a teammate up.  John Wooden was a devout Christian. I have to wonder if his rule was inspired by this passage.

Full disclosure: I love Deebo Samuel. I do not hold this instance against him—though I do think there is a lot to learn from it and for sports fans to discuss. For example, one argument made in Samuel's favorite is the notion of player accountability.

This principle suggests that there is value in teammates holding each other accountable. I don't disagree. The question is How? When? Where? And what is an effective way for a teammate to hold another accountable? I think these are questions for coaches and players to ask and to answer.

Player accountability Fortunately, Moody made the 44-yard game-winner as time expired and helped the 49ers get home with a win. When asked about the incident, Deebo said, “Just frustrated in the heat of battle. It was a close game and I kinda got out of character a little bit. But I’ll talk to Moody and we’ll get past it.”

Moody responded,  “Like I said, it’s in the heat of the moment – it happens. I do have to make those kicks at the end of the day, so that’s all I’m focused on. I’m not worried on anything like that.”

If Moody had missed that kick however, how might we perceive the notion of player accountability differently. Would we?

In the post-game press conference, Shanahan said, “I don’t have much of a take because I didn’t see any of it.  I just got told about it – but probably an obvious one, guys frustrated and something probably happened and you know brothers scuffle a little bit. I didn’t see any of it, so I don’t know how bad it was, but something I’m not too worried about, we’ll fix it. If it hasn’t been fixed already, we’ll fix it on the plane and go back to loving each other tomorrow.” 

I have to wonder what are Coach Shanahan's rules? What are his non-negotiables? Not a criticism, just a question. 

Photo Credits
Wooden
Coach and Deebo

Reverse Rubbernecking

Waze informed me it would be 12 minutes before I would get to and through the traffic jam. I noticed that the accident wasn't even on my side of the road. No lanes were closed and yet traffic ensued. How? Why?! Rubbernecking. According to Progressive auto-insurance,

Rubbernecking occurs when drivers take their eyes off the road to look at a distraction, such as an accident or arrest. The term originated in the late 1800s to describe the act of turning and stretching the neck to eavesdrop. Today, it's synonymous with the same motion but is now commonly associated with the action that takes place while driving—namely slowing down to see an event that happened to someone else. Rubbernecking is a form of distracted driving that can be as dangerous as texting or talking on the phone while driving. 

To me, rubbernecking isn't that much different than gossip. We are curious creatures. Who doesn't want the low down? We want to know, but, like gossip, we seldom feel better after engaging, or in this case, taking the long look. Still, this blog is not meant to be a rant on rubbernecking or to preach against the tyranny of talk. Instead, I would like to offer all sports fans a practice worth pursuing. In June 2019, I wrote "Practice Reverse Gossip." Now I would like to offer a similar post. You guessed it: reverse rubbernecking.

This morning at the gym, highlights of the Golden State Warriors win over the Boston Celtics decorated and dominated local and national sports news. From Warriors' Coach Steve Kerr getting booed (for not givingCeltics star, Jason Tatum much playing time in the Olympics) to the recent success of the Splash Buddies, (the Splash Brothers are no more) there was enough electric content to make this reel worth running every half hour.

I noticed that every time the game summary appeared on the TV, I couldn't look away. In no way was I gawking. I found myself watching again, and again and again. Hadn't I just seen these shots? I marveled at one player among the others: Stephen Curry. Steph not only led the Warriors with 27 points, 9 assists, and 7 rebounds he made it look effortless. And that is how it felt to take it all in....

I took my eyes off of my weights and kept them on the screen. I remained curious; I wanted to see more. As I did, I realized my brain slowed down. It felt as though it opened up in watching but one thing or in this case one athlete (see Flow channel). My friend Jimmy, a die hard Celtics fan admitted "much respect for Steph. One of my all time favorites to watch." I wasn't the only one to feel this way. 

What's the lesson to learn? Watch! Enjoy the long look. Give your brain a positive pause. Let it soak something in. Rather than taking your eyes off the road and turning your head, reverse the rubberneck. Keep your focus on what's seeking your attention.

Obviously this analogy can only go so far. It falls short because the fact of the matter is if you are driving a car, you're not free to just pull over and gaze. You have some place to be. And yet, I think there's a need to name this playful  idea.

Reverse rubbernecking— came about as I stood near the start line of the WCAL III cross country race. Though I have not coached XC since 2015, I make a point of attending what is final league meet of the season every year. It takes place at a true cross country course—Crystal Springs. The 3.1 mile trek is situated in a space replete with rolling hills, very few trees and a designated path. One my think it's open space, but its primary function is for the sport of cross country, and in particular to showcase a race like this one. Once I got there, I knew I was in a place where I would see something special. 

At WCAL I in early October, I caught sight of a fantastic runner—one who makes a case for reverse rubbernecking. I didn't know anything about this senior, but I heard a buzz from the crowd when the varsity boys race convened. In a few minutes time, I realized why. The winner Miles Cook from Sacred Heart Cathedral Prep took the lead very early on and at no point in time was it close to compromised. As he emerged through the tunnel and onto the Polo Fields, the crowd started cheering as he completed this final 400 m to the finish line. He came through running fast and looking strong. Exhaustion? pain? agony? not on his face. He too made it look effortless. To watch him run was a thing of beauty. It's something for every sports fan to savor. Though that is not the reason I went to WCAL III, once I was there, I was excited for what I was in for. Cook did not disappoint.

Take these images to heart. When you see sport at its best: watch! Don't look away. Give your brain a break and let it behold what is unfolding before your eyes.

I wonder if I commit to reverse rubbernecking—will I find more to enjoy? Will I encounter more sport to savor? I'm happy to focus in on Steph this season as a social experiment. Stay tuned.

Photo Credits
Rubbernecking
Coach Kerr
Miles Cook
Highlights: Photo and reel is here

Thank you, Dodgers: A Personal Ethic of Sports Gambling

Bless me Father for I have sinned. It has been three months since my last confession. This is what I have done wrong: I bet on the Los Angeles Dodgers.

While I would not seek out the Sacrament of Reconciliation for gambling on the World Series Champions, I did send this text to a friend of mine—a Jesuit priest and ardent Dodger fan. He was delighted to read that I believed in his team enough to put my money behind them. I did. I won.

When I heard the odds, the Dodgers -140, I quickly placed a straight bet on LA to win the series. Those pesky Dodgers have one stacked line-up and the third highest payroll in MLB. I knew enough about the team and the Yankees to consider this to be a smart bet.* However, as each game unfolded, my smart bet felt like a dirty one. Not because it's illegal or illicit, but because in betting for LA to win, I found myself cheering for them—and for me, that's a problem. Fortunately, I learned a lesson that I would like to share with all sports fans and especially the parents of young sports fans: I believe an ethic of (sports) gambling is important.

Maybe you think that's funny or unrealistic. One friend said to me "You have this because you are a Religion teacher and teach ethics. but I think it's worth consideration. Sports betting is incredibly accessible (thank you internet) and unstigmatized. I liken it to a controlled substance. There is an age requirement for legal gambling (21) and it can be entertaining, engaging and fun. It is also risky and for those with addictive tendencies, it can be problematic. I do believe that those who choose to gamble ought to consider how they plan to participate. What can one afford? What are the limits? What if you push the limits? We know the benefits, but what are the consequences. Those are the formal rules, but this Dodger bet invited me to consider others.

I can and will never bet against my own team. I hold this as a categorical imperative. I am not willing to put my personal loyalty aside for the purpose of financial gain. How I support my team holds no bearing on the final outcome and yet I am too emotionally tied to my team's success. I hate losing, period. To lose the game and win money is cognitive dissonance. When a friend who self-identifies as a Yankee fan told me he bet on the Dodgers as well, I found myself questioning his devotion to the Bronx Bombers. I asked, "Are you a big Yankees fan?" What is your thought on this? Consider the question in the creation of your own ethic.

By a similar standard, I don't bet ON my favorite teams: the Fighting Irish, 49ers, Giants or Warriors. I cannot say I would never do it. I won't commit to not doing it, but as a personal ethic, for me, it's better that I don't. I care too much. I get enough enjoyment out of my own teams' play that I believe gambling will compromise. Furthermore, making what a "smart bet" is clouded by personal bias; it's hard to be objective about one's team. And yet, I know no team better than my own. By holding an ethic to not betting on my own team, I take these questions and quandaries out of the question. 

Where it gets interesting is what the 2024 World Series left me. I know this was a dream scenario for MLB. I admit, the billing was much more interesting that the Rangers vs. Diamondbacks. I did not like either team and the truth of the matter is that gambling provides an emotional, exciting and direct way to engage. This is part of my ethic. 

I figured my derision for both teams opened a door of opportunity. I placed a reasonable bet—one I could afford to lose and would be happy to win and waited to see what would happen. 

Maybe it was the excitement of the series—and it was dynamic and thrilling. The first game in LA went into extra innings and easily could have gone to either team. Freddie Freeman's walk off home run was why we love October baseball. The talent of both squads, questionable choices of Aaron Boone, fan interference and its impact on the game as well as the importance of defense made for viewing numbers unlike those in years past. I'd like to think I kept an eye on the games and my ear close to the ground because I'm a baseball fan, but I know it's because I had money involved. I didn't tell most people I had a bet on the series because it prompted me to cheer for the Dodgers. Again: cognitive dissonance. I found myself singing the praises of the players I actively root against: Max Muncy, Gavin Lux, Blake Treinen? Ugh! Gross. If they had lost, one could argue that would fuel my fire for this rivalry. Instead, we were now close bedfellows. 

The 2024 World Series taught me that an ideal situation....and I think it is now part of my ethic, is if my team is NOT in the final contest, to bet on a team that I like that isn't at odds with my own team. For example, if the Niners are not in the Super Bowl, I have no problem cheering for the Buffalo Bills. They are in another division, I like Josh Allen, I can rally behind Bills Mafia, I am tired of the Kansas City Chiefs, etc. This feels *right* to me.

In the past two years, I am indirectly aware that a large number of my students—seniors in high school are betting on sports. In my Sports and Spirituality class, gambling has become a hot topic in the student led Sports in the News presentations. There is a lot of joking and snickering around the subject. Students speak of the odds, the over/under and  more. In short, there are regular attempts to integrate the language of sports betting into class. I never knew "parlay" would be so colloquial! Students have asked me my stance on sports betting, and I've told them. I opened a Draft Kings account for the sole purpose of finding out for myself how easy it is to place bets and the extent of what one can gamble on. The options are endless. In fact, I found it remarkably difficult to place a straight up bet, the app was littered with prop bets, teasers and more. When I mentioned that certain sports bets were not possible to place in California, several students advised me to access a firewall. I realized quite quickly what used to be a bit of a joking matter, was now an everyday activity, a common experience and a culture I help support. 

If you haven't thought about an ethic around sports betting, it's worth further consideration and conversation. Talk to others and get their thoughts—people hold interesting and varied points of view. One way to learn is to engage....if you do, good luck! And keep is clean ;-)

*Smart Bet: rhetorical statement. I wonder, do gamblers place any bet that isn't "smart" in their own eyes? Maybe... again, more worth consideration

Photo Credits
Max Muncy
Trophy
Sports Bet