Hats and Hoodies vs. Ritual and Respect

It is no secret that I am an ardent fan, a loyal listener and subscriber to Sacred Stories. In fact, my last post was about this very topic and how each video from the Notre Dame Alumni Association has shaped my Advent Journey in preparation for Christmas. But, I've lived long enough to know, nothing is above reproach—especially this blog and its author—and that includes a recent video reflection featuring Notre Dame senior, Chris Kavanaugh.

I have yet to find a testimony that doesn't inspire and invite me to prayer. But I admit when I see an athlete or coach approach the screen, I am that much more excited to hear their tale, consider their questions and reflect upon their connections. I am biased, but I was also disappointed and so distracted by the baseball hat Kavanaugh wore as he spoke, I missed his message.

You may find my complaint to be petty or unimportant. I don't. Hats, hoodies, caps and sunglasses need to be removed when speaking to an audience. Objectively speaking there is no reason that a man or a woman needs to wear a hat indoors. Out of doors is another question—sun, rain or wind?—a hat offers protection. But, when Kyle Shanahan, the head coach of the San Francisco 49ers wears his flat bill during a press conference, I shake my head.

Same Press Conference: GM John Lynch—no hat, Coach Shanahan—flat bill. 

Removing a hat is a sign of respect. It is a custom or norm that has been observed, primarily by men. Emily Post weighs in what I find to be valuable historical context and helpful direction:

Knowing when to remove a hat is as important as wearing the right hat for the occasion. If you were a medieval knight who failed to remove his helmet or lift his visor and identify himself the consequences could be fatal. Throughout history hats identified social standing and removing a hat was a gesture of respect. 

In the "old days," men took off their hats in Christian churches, when they entered someone's home, when greeting a boss, and always in the presence of a lady. While some of these customs are now historical footnotes, even in today's casual culture, men and women still remove their hats as a sign of respect. Cancer patients are exempt from hat rules. They may keep their hats or caps on at all times if they wish. 

Today, times are different. Still Post notes: Take hats off, including baseball caps …

• In someone's home
• At mealtimes, at the table
• While being introduced, indoors or out (unless it's frigid!)
• In a house of worship, unless a hat or head covering is required
• Indoors at work, especially in an office (unless required for the job)
• In public buildings such as a school, library, courthouse, or town hall
• In restaurants and coffee shops
• At a movie or any indoor performance
• When the national anthem is played
• When the flag of the United States passes by, as in a parade

Today, it's as if no rules apply. People wear hats anywhere and everywhere. For example, I recently attended a Christmas party where a friend wore his Yankees hat inside the home. I was slightly surprised he did this, while relieved that he took it off for Mass (which was held in the home as well). Yes, customs and norms can and do change over time, but many are worth keeping and/or learning more about. In addition to showing respect, taking a hat off allows one person to see another face to face. Wearing a baseball hat or hoodie, it's not hard to hide behind the lid. While it's not as overt an obstacle as sunglasses, this accessory does change a dynamic, even if slightly.

Baseball hats are not the only offender. On a regular basis, I have to remind students to put their hoodies down. In the latest episodes of Hard Knocks: NFC North, the number of athletes who speak to the camera with their hoodie still on their head is alarming. I truly do not know what that is about.

It is impossible to listen and view Kavanaugh's testimony and NOT know he is a member of the Fighting Irish Championship lacrosse team. I don't need to see his hat or read his sweatshirt to figure that out. It's a point of pride its inextricably linked to his Sacred Story. But I was sidetracked from his story by my question of Why. Why wear the hat? Why is it necessary? Will we see people wearing hats backwards or hoodies in the future? And Why didn't the director, producer, editor ask him to remove it? 

I  love the ritual of taking hats off to shake hands upon the completion of a round of golf. I like the effort it takes, the message it sends, the respect it offers—at no cost. To me, it speaks volume. It says "I see you. I thank you and you're welcome."

Respect, honor, intentionality, and authenticity always come at some cost.  Attention and effort play their part in building those virtues. One small way is to tap your cap and/or take it off. Another is to share your story. Many of those are sacred. Let's remove our hats, hoodies and glasses to share them...and as we listen.

Photo Credits
Lynch and Shanahan
Post Hats
Sacred Stories

You're With Us: A Message from the Notre Dame Football Chaplain for our Advent Journey

It's Advent—a time of penance and preparation. How are you getting your heart and home ready for Christmas? Like countless Notre Dame alumni, I make a point to watch and pray with Sacred Stories, created by the alumni association. I look forward to the daily drop on YouTube and other social media platforms—excited to see who will share their story. A few have been classmates and friends! Others are athletes, coaches, administrators and alumni. 

While each story is sacred, some are extra special. Many speak specifically to a Notre Dame audience, but most offer a message that is meant for all, regardless of your familiarity or connection to the university. Among my favorites for the Advent 2024 journey is the testimony from Day 2 by Father Nate Wills, C.S.C. I found his message particularly poignant for the first week of Advent, when we light the purple candle signifying hope.

Father Nate is the football chaplain for the Fighting Irish. This is well known as he is an active, noticeable and positive presence on the sidelines. In his Sacred Story, he takes us back to a memory from his rookie days in the role. 

Three words made all the difference. In true Holy Cross/Notre Dame fashion, I thought he would say "Come Holy Spirit." This is the prayer that the beloved past President, Father Ted Hesburgh C.S.C. urged others to pray. (NB: How I wish Father Ted had recorded a Sacred Story of his own; I don't even want to know if A.I. can help). Instead, his three words are "You're with us." I encourage you to watch here and now (or watch again).

What were we all to hear "You're with us?" How might we be different? How might our society change? I think of the school where I work. If every teenager heard this message and believed it, How would this community feel? 

"You're with us" reminds us of what Father Greg Boyle, SJ teaches: There is no 'them' and 'us.' There is only us. Unfortunately, we lose sight of this truth, and yet I believe Father Nate's testimonial is a message of hope. His recollection reminds me that there are those people who think to extend that spirit of welcome. I know those who have the courage to say those words—and I thank God for them. They give me hope. And we have a God who does the same. God offered hope in Christ Jesus In Matthew's Gospel, we read:

All this took place to fulfill what the Lord had said through the prophet: “Behold, the virgin shall be with child and bear a son, and they shall name him Emmanuel,” which means “God is with us.” 

Father Nate puts this teaching into context with this holy time of year. He says,  

We’re one with him and we anticipate the coming of Christ, Emmanuel, God with us, anew this Advent season. Even though it can sometimes feel otherwise, we always belong to the Christian family into which we have been adopted.

We never walk alone. We’re with him, and he’s with us.

I love the image of the player walk in this video. It helps us to visualize the time and space when and where Father Nate felt alone. It also reminds us of what we will celebrate on Christmas Day: God with us. Not just me, not only you. Us. 

Our Prayer
For the times we feel uncertain, and in the moments we feel like an outsider.
When we split into groups or don’t know where to go. In places where we will doubt or panic—where uncertainty seems to reign, Let us remember to welcome the stranger, to include the lost, to harbor the lonely to smile to others. Give us the courage to say “You’re with us.”And the ability to join.


In this Advent season, we celebrate Jesus being born into the world because God loved us so much that he even wanted to share in our humanity, to be with us. Let us remember we are part of a Christian family that gives that same promise by our loving God: “You’re with us.”

We’re one with him and we anticipate the coming of Christ, Emmanuel, God with us, anew this Advent season. Even though it can sometimes feel otherwise, we always belong to the Christian family into which we have been adopted.

Past Posts from ND Alumni Association for Lent
2023 with Audric Estimé
Sacred Places at ND: Josh Lugg
Sacred Plaaces at ND: Sam Grewe

Photo Credits
Father Nate Prayer
Player Walk
Intro is from the Reflection

Among My Favorite "Things"—the Pick-Six

In a recent essay, a student wrote, "Well, it's a thing." I did not know how to respond to that. "A thing?" I asked. "I need some direction. Help me understand," I added. I found myself eating my own words this past week as I considered what I like best in sport and spirituality.

There are several reasons to savor the Notre Dame victory over USC, but one that stands out is that it featured one of my favorite "things" in sports. Yes, I am using the ambiguous word "thing," because I'm not sure how else to categorize it. Football fans know, that a Pick-6 is when a defensive player catches the ball from the quarterback and scores a touchdown for their team (six points). Recalling the two late in the fourth quarter invited me to revisit how we think about, categorize, appreciate, and celebrate what happens in athletics. Given that both sport and spirituality are dynamic—ever-changing, unfolding, evolving, and inspiring, this work is never done. To me, this is a good problem to have!

When I started teaching Sports and Spirituality, an elective course for seniors I created a “personal inventory.” The purpose of the poll is to take stock of the experiences in athletics and in the spiritual life that stand out among the others. Some do. You can see my list here!

In teaching and writing about this topic, I have come to understand that "Sports and Spirituality" is more meaningful and memorable when one can draw from their experience as an athlete or a sports fan to think more concretely about the spiritual life. In the same way that not all athletic disciplines need to be tedious, challenging, or painful, those in the spiritual life need not be either.

I enjoyed creating categories for each domain. Some students struggle with prompts like "I have read a great book about sports. It is..." or "I have seen a great movie about spirituality. It is..."  Others have an answer for each item on the list. 

This semester I asked my students to partner up and add to this list. Look at the cool categories they added! I made this request shortly after a friend sent this creative video of the two pick-sixes in the fourth quarter of the Notre Dame vs. USC game. One of the personal highlights of that game is that my friends and I sat in the end zone where we had an unobstructed view of each interception. 

As written on CBS Sports, "Notre Dame defensive back Christian Gray returned an interception 99 yards the other way for a touchdown with 3:39 remaining. On USC's following drive, Irish safety Xavier Watts returned an interception 101 yards the other way for Notre Dame's second defensive touchdown to seal the win." Not only did that put the Irish up by two possessions, it changed the momentum of the game. The Irish D made a statement, and then they did it less than 3 minutes later once again.

A pick-six is a remarkable feat. It's a bold act. I think it is one of the best "things" in sports. But how else might we categorize it: Momentum changer? Surprise move? Furthermore, I realize this claim is riding an emotional high given where and when it was completed. Give me some time and distance from the game and I might say the same thing. Maybe not. This is what makes sports...and spirituality fun.

Here is the new list authored by my students

Personal Inventory: Sports

• My favorite uniform in sports
• My favorite mid-range shooter

• My favorite sports brand


• My favorite Hall of Fame
in Sports 
• Favorite rivalry in sports


• Best MVP
in sport

• My favorite victory / emote dance
• My favorite team mascot



Personal Inventory: Spirituality

• My favorite Bible verse
• My favorite spiritual symbol
• My favorite way to pray
• My favorite person in the Bible
• My favorite Church/cathedral
• My favorite Religious Holiday

I love their ingenuity and creativity!

I moderate the Bowling Club at St. Ignatius, where I teach. Earlier this week, we had our holiday/ugly sweater/Christmas Cookie bowling night. One of my students turned to me and said "Ms. Stricherz, the guy next to us has a perfect game." I looked up at the scoreboard and sure enough, seven frames in, all I could see were Xs on the scoreboard. Other people in the alley realized what was happening and you could hear a semi-silent buzz as we looked on. Strike, strike, strike and strike. 300! We saw perfection. Our group gave this amateur a round of applause. His wife took his photo and gave him a hug. I wanted to do the same. I quickly looked up the odds of bowling a 300. For professionals, it's 450 to 1 but for the mortals like us, it is 11,500 to 1. Amazing!

Again, I began to wonder how I might categorize what I just saw on my personal inventory. Favorite perfect feat? Best in show? Excellent thing? I only want to put experiences like what happened at the LA Coliseum and on bowling night into some sort of context because it helps me to recall and remember an event in a particular space in time. Sports fans are blessed with said moments regularly. When people tell me the downside of sports, how they are tainted and corrupt, and the ways they clog the conversation—I don't totally disagree. But I also know how I feel when I have been a witness when I have seen something special or hit something so purely—that too can be spiritual. That's a good "thing." 

Photo Credits
Christian Gray
Xavier Watts

Agony and Ecstasy: Take-Aways from Notre Dame vs. USC

I don't have high blood pressure. 93 over 60 is on the low side. That being said, I am certain that my numbers were far different on Saturday, November 30, 2024 when I saw Notre Dame defeat USC 49-35  at the Los Angeles Memorial Coliseum. Attending this historic rivalry game is both a blessing and an agonizing experience. I find myself confronting interesting questions, important ones. Am I glutton for pain? Is it worth it? Why do I care? The purpose of this post is to offer but a few insights to which all sports fan can relate both in the positive and the negative. And the next time I see you, I hope you will add, amend and acknowledge some truth in it all.

It's personal.
I won't apologize. I can't. I hate USC. I didn't go to Cal or to UCLA. I'm a Notre Dame grad. We share this sentiment. The reasons for our shared disdain are abundant, but I'm supposed to take some high road (so I've been told) so I'll keep it brief. 

To a large degree, I have inherited these strong sentiments. My Dad and my uncle can't stand the Trojans. It's not for the infamous moniker "University of Spoiled Children" as much as it is for the number of National Championships they have cost ND. To their credit, they have great athletes who manifest their two word slogan: Fight On.

However, I don't like their athletes, their ethos or the way that they play. Chippy is one way to describe it. Furthermore, I do not appreciate that their fans boo the visiting team upon entering and exiting the field (at the start of the game, at the half, etc). That is unsportsmanlike conduct. Their is no penalty, except for the fact it speaks volumes about their character. I don't know what I would do if my team did that as a regular practice; it is not okay.

I know many alumni who are loud and proud of their school; I get that. Notre Dame alums are no different....but we are.

Quite the Headache
Unfortunately, I arrived on campus with a headache. No, I was not hungover. Despite taking three Advil, the discomfort did not subside. I found it symbolic. The USC marching band was directly across the stadium from where we were sitting. At times, I could hear my head pounding to the relentless beat of that drum. 

Their fight song is incessant. It seems to pause for but a few announcements and media spotlights. The Coliseum does play popular hype songs, but these are even interrupted for the band to play "Fight on." It's not hard to imagine the men of Troy going to war with that soundtrack in the background. I have always wondered if students and alumni appreciate it. Trojans: weigh in, please!

Number 13
Regular readers of this blog know that I am not a Caleb Williams fan. In fact, I actively root against him in the NFL for a multitude of reasons—again, which I have blogged about before. I could hardly believe my eyes when I saw his return on the field for the retirement of his jersey. A transfer from Oklahoma, Williams played but two years for the Trojans. He won a Heisman. during his first year with the team and early on in his second year was supposed to win it again. Jayden Daniels took the prize.

Yes, he was the number one pick in the 2023 NFL draft. He holds a number of personal records and as written on the USC Trojans football website he "was instrumental in successfully turning around a program that went 4-8 in the 2021 season to an 11-3 team in 2022." But in his second season, the Trojans underperformed; they finished 8 and 5. There is room to celebrate individual achievements and success, but last time I checked football is a team sport. Some call it the ultimate team sport. I question the decision to retire his jersey this soon. You might not agree...it's certainly up for debate.

Speaking of debate...
We live in a new era of college sports. Once known as student-athletes, many of these young men and women are not amateurs. While they may not earn a salary, many—not all—receive compensation via booster gifts, agreements with companies to utilize their names, images, and likeness, and endorse products. They can also earn money through corporate sponsorships and support from other sources. In light of this reality, I have started to wonder, Given that these athletes are paid, should they be fined for the penalties they commit on the field?  And should the ND Assistant Coach who was penalized for unsportsmanlike conduct get one, too?

I ask this question because as written on NFL Football Operations page, "The NFL uses the fine schedule to outline the league’s and the union’s expectations for players to conduct themselves in a way that honors the sport and respects the game, themselves, their fellow players, the fans and the league. The rules are intended to protect the players from unnecessary risk, promote player safety and emphasize sportsmanship and respect of teammates, opponents, coaches, officials and fans." I find the entire system and pay structure fascinating. Check it out. 

Actions have consequences and given what is at stake, I'm not convinced a financial penalty isn't worth further consideration. The fighting between OSU and Michigan this past weekend brings this into a new light. Still, if you find my question ridiculous or inappropriate, I understand. On some level it is and yet, the sheer amount of money swimming/driving/fueling the ecosystem of college football is too. 

Notable Change
NIL hasn't just changed the face of college sports for just the athletes, but it has shifted the apparel of the fans as well. In the past, all jerseys included but the school name and number. On Saturday, I couldn't help but take inventory of who wore what. Notable examples include:
#5 Te'0, #7 Estime, #9 Zibikowski, and of course #10 Hartman. 

It's nearly antithetical to Irish football to have names on the jersey (minus the Shamrock Series and the Bowl game) but they are for sale! I don't have strong opinions against them, it's just a trend in this new era. But so are the all white uniforms ND wore. To quote my friend, Andy "I don't hate the uniforms." How I love a good double negative.

Both Pick-Sixes happened right in front of our eyes.
This was taken after Xavier Watts ran the ball 99 yards for a TD securing the W

Accentuate the Positive
In spite of the agony, the ecstasy came in the form of not one but two pick-sixes late in the game leading the Irish to victory. Winning in enemy territory is never easy, especially at the Coliseum. It is always something to celebrate. Yes, we were hyped. See photo above.

Furthermore, a football game in Southern California in late November? Not too bad. It was sunny and 75 with a beautiful skyline. I loved the time with friends—making new memories— and interacting with other fans.

USC knows pageantry. Yes, I will complain about the band, but their uniforms, Trigger, and some of the on field recognitions are very impressive. For example, they acknowledged two USC grads who are members of the World Series Championship team, the LA Dodgers. Congratulations to Kyle Hurt and Mark Prior. Totally makes sense that you would be acknowledged at a game. Well played USC, well deserved gentlemen.

One of my favorite parts of the weekend was the Mass at Our Savior Parish and USC Caruso Catholic Center cohosted by the USC and ND Club of Los Angeles Alumni Associations. As stated on their website, it "is a home for Trojans of all ages who wish to learn and live out their Catholic faith." The Church was beautiful and in a modified round seating. The music was prayerful, the preaching was powerful (thanks to visiting co-presider Father Bob Dowd, C.S.C, the President of the University of Notre Dame). They have space adjacent to the church for communal gatherings, featuring indoor and outdoor seating. If I were at a student at USC, I would be drawn to this spiritual home. It is a gift to the larger Church. Thank you, Rick Caruso.

In Conclusion
I always debate whether or not to go to this game—every other Thanksgiving weekend. I know what I'm in for emotionally, financially, personally and even physically. Nothing is scripted. There are no guarantees. However, a chance to see my team in person, to spend time with dear friends and share Mass, a meal and a game?! So many blessings. Those are the numbers worth counting.

Photo Credits
White Uniforms
Our Savior/Caruso Center

2024 De La Salle Hall of Fame Ceremony: Many Irons in the Fire

Some teachers and coaches want to do away with extraordinary awards. I know some schools opt to forgo a sports hall of fame. I have heard their arguments. I understand their concerns. I believe however not only are they important and worthwhile, every teacher and coach in the building ought to attend. The De La Salle High School Athletic Hall of Fame Ceremony reminds me why.

As written on the De La Salle website, every autumn,"we induct a new class of exceptional student-athletes who have grown into even more exceptional men. Each honoree is selected not just for their athletic talent and skill, but also for their work ethic, community involvement, and spirit of brotherhood." I take note of who has earned the inductions—remembering and/or reading more about their past achievements. I appreciate that they honor individual athletes, entire teams, coaches and one "distinguished alumni of the year." I take great pride in nominating the 2015 honoree, my dear friend Mary Frances' brother— Brigadier General Timothy P. McGuire '83, USMA '87.

The school makes a point of honoring the "class"at the Homecoming football game on Friday night and a ceremony that is open to all on Sunday. The Athletic Director, the tireless Leo Lopoz '94, welcomes family and friends of the inductees and of DLS. The President, David Holquin calls the group to a sacred silence. "Let us remember..." he says and begins with a prayer. Robert Bronstein, who has covered Bay Area high school sports for the past 33 years serves as the Master of Ceremonies. He introduces a pre-recorded video—a testimony from a coach, teacher, teammate, sibling or community member who speaks on the inductee's behalf. The honoree takes the stage, some for but a few minutes others for much more. Each one speaks in his own way—from the heart (Scooter Barry) or with copies notes (Coach Allocco), recalling memories, moments, lessons learned, what they loved and even what they want to forget ;-)

A number of these HOF members recall adversity and its role, import and significance in their journey. Whether it was being raised by a single parent, overcoming an injury, the personal and financial sacrifices to attend DLS, no one is exempt. Yes, some men were dealt a much different hand than others, but all found mentors and support on Winton Drive. This is no time for complaint. 

Two legendary coaches and friends: Bob Laduouceur and Frank Allocco

And this is exactly why teachers and coaches need to hear, and what we need to keep in the back of our minds. I have yet to attend this event— when or where an honoree has thanked his coaches and teachers for not holding them accountable. No one says, you listened to all of my excuses. You cut me slack every time I needed it. Standards? You had none. You won't hear this because their message is quite the opposite. I still remember one swimmer who thanked his math teacher, Scott Hirsch for all it took to get from the A- to the A. Excellence is never handed over; it's earned. Good job, Spartans...and of course, Mr. Hirsch DLS 2004 HOF inductee.

This message is not new but at this time of year, it's something I desperately need to hear. I had to tell a student last week "in the last month, the only two questions you have asked in this class are Can I go to the bathroom and You marked this question wrong. Can you change my grade?" Working with teenagers has its set of ongoing, unique challenges. Gatherings like the HOF ceremony however, remind us that kids may not appreciate standards and expectations in the moment, but they will rise to them. Some even beyond. 

So teachers and coaches, parents and administrators take heart. None of us do this alone. We are part of a much larger ecosystem and that is why a Hall of Fame ceremony is not a private event. It is something the larger community ought to celebrate and consider. Proverbs 27:17 states, "As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another." But there are many irons in that fire. Many, but not all were in attendance on October 27, 2024. Congratulations to the Class of 2024.

Photo Credits
De La Salle Honorees

Prayer Service for Football: One Letter, One Body

On November 22, 2024 the St. Ignatius Wildcats won the CCS Open Division football championship 10-7 over the Lancers of St. Francis. They did this in the pouring rain with family and friends in red ponchos cheering for them every step of the way. Congratulations to this talented team—a spirited squad—and all who helped them to get there. 

I have gotten to know this group a little better as my colleague and I have led their prayer services this season. It has been an honor and privilege to offer these young men a sacred pause in their day—a time to reflect and listen to the Word of God. Each gathering offers students a moment to center and ground themselves in the gift and opportunity of playing football.

I am not their team chaplain. I hope in the future that a faculty member will officially take on that role and be an integrated presence on and off the field for these athletes. However, as a contributing voice in Sports and Spirituality, I have a skill set, the ability and desire to create and design what I hope has been meaningful pre-game gatherings. 

Through this experience I have learned there aren't many resources for team chaplains or coaches to access, refine and replicate. I was motivated to write Pray and Practice with Purpose for this very reason. Were I to publish another edition, I will add what I have used throughout this season. A coach, chaplain, athletic director or sports and spirituality teacher has a much better sense of what will speak to their team, their athletes. I say that as a word of encouragement. Still an outline or framework is a great place to start. This role has not been easy. It may sound hard to believe, but a 15-20 minute service takes me about four hours to plan. You want to have student involvement and get outside voices contributing to the meeting. And so it is with great joy and thanks to George Kittle, that I share one example. Feel free to review and reuse, modify or mend. I have four others to pass along. This *might* be my favorite. Enjoy!

Theme: Hope and Intention: We are one Body
My colleague and I have determine a theme for each prayer service. Most are tied to our Jesuit roots. Yes, we speak Ignatian. And yet, at St. Ignatius, a popular song among the student body is "One Body in Christ." I decided to capitalize upon this theme, knowing how it connects to a reading in scripture and an important pre-game ritual for Niners tight-end, George Kittle.

Context for the team:
Long before text messages and emails, letters were an important form of communication. I still remember the day when the acceptance letter came in the mail for college decisions and the rejections. The very sight of the letter—Was it thick or thin? gave an answer.

Some of the great leaders in history have been known for their letter writing. Teddy Roosevelt was known to have written about 6.8 letters / day!
Letters like these, whether professional or personal, have become artifacts and serve as primary sources 
Scripture includes letters, too. The Apostle Paul wrote to different Christian communities and churches to nurture, encourage, instruct, and correct their errors in theology and their lifestyle. His letter to the community in Corinth sets an important tone for us here today.
This passage, "One Body, Many Parts" speaks to a theme we have here at St Ignatius. It is a song we sing: We are one Body, One body in Christ.
As a team, you have learned you must work as one. Let us pray together for that grace.


Reading: A senior read from 1 Corinthians 12: 12-26 (for brevity and clarity, I took out a few lines)

Letters are important today. In fact, reading a letter is an important spiritual discipline for George Kittle. As noted in the hit Netflix series “Receiver," it's an important part of Kittle's pre-game ritual. I’d like to share that with you now.

Video: Episode 7 "Don't Have a Choice": 23:45-26:20

These prayer services have become part of your pregame rituals. And I’d like to integrate that practice of letter writing/reading that you saw between Bruce Kittle and his son, George to our time together today. I’ve asked your Coach to share a letter he has for you….

Coach reads the letter he wrote to the team out loud.

Following this sharing, I invite the team to take a moment to pray for Coach.
Pray in gratitude for his tireless leadership and his vision. We pray for his family and this notion of family he has cultivated here.

That is just the first part of Kittle’s pregame routine. I’d like to share with you the other parts of it.

Resume the video: 26:20 to 27:40

Visualization Exercise: I'm not going to invite you into a similar meditation, right here, right now. You can do as Kittle does when you get to the stadium, but let's start the exercise here.

• Close your eyes, put both feet flat on the floor.
• Take in the Stadium
• Appreciate the moment you’re living in
• Center yourself
• Take some deep breaths
• SLOW DOWN
• Look for your family…your friends in the stands
• Talk to yourself
• Offer a Positive Affirmation
• What do you need to let go of…
• Breathe In
• Breathe out
• Who do you want to remember? Who are you playing for? 
• Ask God to watch over you
• Flip the Switch….GO

I love GKK because he is enthusiastic and energetic, he’s talented and hardworking and he’s incredibly intentional and grounded. The man is loyal and locked in. He has purpose. He lives with positivity. He is hopeful. And so I’ve asked a few people to offer a hope that they have for you today.

Hope/Intention: One coach, one alumni and one former from another Jesuit school had a hope/intention for the team that I had three different seniors read out loud. (this was awesome! I even had a senior who played the same position as the alum and former player read their words on their behalf).

With these hopes, these intentions, these prayers, let us offer the prayer that Jesus taught us…. Praying the Our Father brought us to a close. 

In Conclusion: This prayer service tied so many important ideas and themes together: unity, hope and intention. I loved shared the personal story of a real time player who appears wild and zany but proves to be incredibly grounded. George Kittle draws great strength and support from his wife, parents and family. I do want these players to realize how their family, friends and the SI community does the same. Practically speaking, this story may not resonate with your team in the same way because, Kittle isn't a local hero. You may also take issue with a bit of foul language (you can easily work around this and shorten the clip). However, the rationale behind the letter writing is certainly relatable for a number of young men and his routine is so easy to replicate. 

I look forward to sharing the others. This team play again in the Northern California playoffs. Future prayer service theme is yet to come...

photo credits
BruceKittle
George Reading
George ESPN
All SI Images from school

Letter to a Rival: Thank you Roger and Thank you Rafa

One assignment in my Ethics class requires students to write a "Call to Action" letter to an organization or a particular politician. In addition to a grade, my students receive a envelope and a stamp. I don't know why it continues to surprise me, but for the past twenty years I have had to teach high school students how to format and address the letter. They cry, "No one writes letters anymore!"  I pause. "That's interesting. I wrote Joe's college letter of recommendation two weeks ago." They respond "Those are different." "Are they? I ask. "Seems like there is a message that is delivered in the written form." While we may not use pen to paper, letters are not a thing of the past. We write cards and send text messages. We author thank you notes and pour out or hearts with love letters. And today, I read a new one: a love letter to a rival.

Letters in sports aren't uncommon. Upon his retirement Michael Jordan scripted a love letter to basketball; so did Kobe. When Barry Zito left the San Francisco Giants, he took out a full page in the San Francisco Chronicle that featured his letter of gratitude to the fans. I love when athletes think to do this. Earlier this year, I wrote about a letter from John Fisher, the owner of the Oakland A's. I read this "great work of fiction" to my class and much to my surprise, I got choked up. Letters are both personal and private, sometimes public, often revelatory.

As written in The Athletic, "Roger Federer says Rafael Nadal made him “enjoy the game even more” as the Spaniard retires from tennis at the Davis Cup in Malaga, Spain this week.

Federer, who retired alongside Nadal at the 2022 Laver Cup, opened a letter in tribute to his great rival with the salient fact of their rivalry: “You beat me — a lot. More than I managed to beat you.” The letter, in its entirety is here:

Vamos, @RafaelNadal

As you get ready to graduate from tennis, I’ve got a few things to share before I maybe get emotional.

Let’s start with the obvious: you beat me—a lot. More than I managed to beat you. You challenged me in ways no one else could. On clay, it felt like I was stepping into your backyard, and you made me work harder than I ever thought I could just to hold my ground. You made me reimagine my game—even going so far as to change the size of my racquet head, hoping for any edge. 

 I’m not a very superstitious person, but you took it to the next level. Your whole process. All those rituals. Assembling your water bottles like toy soldiers in formation, fixing your hair, adjusting your underwear... All of it with the highest intensity. Secretly, I kind of loved the whole thing. Because it was so unique—it was so you. And you know what, Rafa, you made me enjoy the game even more. 

OK, maybe not at first. After the 2004 Australian Open, I achieved the #1 ranking for the first time. I thought I was on top of the world. And I was—until two months later, when you walked on the court in Miami in your red sleeveless shirt, showing off those biceps, and you beat me convincingly. All that buzz I’d been hearing about you—about this amazing young player from Mallorca, a generational talent, probably going to win a major someday—it wasn’t just hype.

We were both at the start of our journey and it’s one we ended up taking together. Twenty years later, Rafa, I have to say: What an incredible run you’ve had. Including 14 French Opens—historic! You made Spain proud... you made the whole tennis world proud.

I keep thinking about the memories we’ve shared. Promoting the sport together. Playing that match on half-grass, half-clay. Breaking the all-time attendance record by playing in front of more than 50,000 fans in Cape Town, South Africa. Always cracking each other up. Wearing each other out on the court and then, sometimes, almost literally having to hold each other up during trophy ceremonies.

I’m still grateful you invited me to Mallorca to help launch the Rafa Nadal Academy in 2016. Actually, I kind of invited myself. I knew you were too polite to insist on me being there, but I didn’t want to miss it. You have always been a role model for kids around the world, and Mirka and I are so glad that our children have all trained at your academies. They had a blast and learned so much—like thousands of other young players. Although I always worried my kids would come home playing tennis as lefties.

And then there was London—the Laver Cup in 2022. My final match. It meant everything to me that you were there by my side—not as my rival but as my doubles partner. Sharing the court with you that night, and sharing those tears, will forever be one of the most special moments of my career.

Rafa, I know you’re focused on the last stretch of your epic career. We will talk when it’s done. For now, I just want to congratulate your family and team, who all played a massive role in your success. And I want you to know that your old friend is always cheering for you, and will be cheering just as loud for everything you do next. 

Rafa that!

Best always, your fan, 
Roger

Wimbledon 2008: largely considered to be one of the greatest matches every played.

Ever gracious, it's not surprising that King Fed would recognize his chief rivals' success against him. However, what surprised me was his appreciation of Rafa's superstitions. Those ticks. The OCD? I found Nadal's rituals and his ways hard to watch on television. At times I would even look away from the camera until I knew the ball was in play. Rather than stand in judgment (I'm good at that) Fed said "I kind of loved the whole thing. Because it was so unique—it was so you." Tan bonito.

And still, Federer raises the bar by congratulating not just Rafa, but "your family and team, who all played a massive role in your success."  Both men know tennis may be an individual sport but no one does it alone. The Nadal family name and even the people of Mallorca have a right to share in the celebration of this legend.

In my post "The 60 Minutes Interview of Rafael Nadal: Simply Beautiful," Wertheim asks Rafa is he ever gets interviewed without a question about King Fed. "Do you ever get tired of being asked about Roger?" He responds "No. Encantado."  Which means, it is my pleasure. Que rico, Rafa.

I am grateful that one of tennis' greats took the time to share his sentiments and honor his greatest rival in the form of missive. He models for us an important and timeless action. In order to write a letter, one must reflect upon another person and consider why you care about them and what they mean to you. With a public or open letter, we the fans received a small window into something we saw develop often twenty years time. And as Proverbs 27 proclaims, As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another. Sports fans around the world were witnesses to one man becoming better both on and off the court because of a shared love, a shared game: tennis.  Rivals? Yes. Friends? Amen.

Photo Credits
Walking
2008
Today

Criticism or Player Accountability? That is the Question

With all due respect to Kyle Shanahan, and I mean that, I have to wonder: If Deebo Samuel had played for John Wooden, would he have treated Jake Moody differently?

I ask this question because the Hall of Fame UCLA men's basketball coach, John Wooden had but three rules for his team. 

1. Be on time: being punctual showed respect for his players' time.
2. No profanity: to use foul language was to relinquish control. He believed it allowed your opponent to know they had gotten inside your head.
3. Never criticize a teammate: to do so doesn't build up a team but puts on member against another. 

Wooden's intention was to create an environment where respect and loyalty were given and received. The poignancy and simplicity of his three rules provided a foundation—a place for players to stand. His players knew what was expected and what would not be tolerated. Any coach knows that rules can and will be broken. And, still the question crossed my mind: Would things be different? 

For context, As written on the Ninerswire:

Tempers flared on the San Francisco 49ers’ sideline during the team’s 23-20 win over the Tampa Bay Buccaneers on Sunday.

After kicker Jake Moody missed his third kick, wide receiver Deebo Samuel had some words for the 49ers’ second-year kicker. Long snapper Taybor Pepper wasn’t happy with whatever Samuel had to say, and got in the receiver’s face. Samuel responded by striking Pepper in the throat. 

There was more yelling between the two players, but no further physical escalation.

Though it's not clear precisely what Deebo said, one thing is: he criticized his teammate. Deebo let frustration get the best of him. Yes, football is an incredibly emotional game. No one will question Deebo's commitment to giving the very best and the most of himself to it. What he puts his body through week after week after week is tremendous. But, Deebo is just one a member of a 53-man roster. No single player can win the game alone. This same message is found in Scripture.

Saint Paul wasn't writing to a football team but in his letter to the people of Corinth speaks to One Body, Many Parts. He writes

As a body is one though it has many parts, and all the parts of the body, though many, are one body, so also Christ. 

Now the body is not a single part, but many. If a foot should say, “Because I am not a hand I do not belong to the body,” it does not for this reason belong any less to the body. Or if an ear should say, “Because I am not an eye I do not belong to the body,” it does not for this reason belong any less to the body.  If the whole body were an eye, where would the hearing be? If the whole body were hearing, where would the sense of smell be? But as it is, God placed the parts, each one of them, in the body as he intended. If they were all one part, where would the body be? But as it is, there are many parts, yet one body. The eye cannot say to the hand, “I do not need you,” nor again the head to the feet, “I do not need you.”  Indeed, the parts of the body that seem to be weaker are all the more necessary. May  there be no division in the body, but that the parts may have the same concern for one another.If [one] part suffers, all the parts suffer with it; if one part is honored, all the parts share its joy.

To criticize a teammate to dishonor them. There is no way that a professional athlete wants to NOT make the catch, play or kick. Rather than tearing a teammate down, it is important to build a teammate up.  John Wooden was a devout Christian. I have to wonder if his rule was inspired by this passage.

Full disclosure: I love Deebo Samuel. I do not hold this instance against him—though I do think there is a lot to learn from it and for sports fans to discuss. For example, one argument made in Samuel's favorite is the notion of player accountability.

This principle suggests that there is value in teammates holding each other accountable. I don't disagree. The question is How? When? Where? And what is an effective way for a teammate to hold another accountable? I think these are questions for coaches and players to ask and to answer.

Player accountability Fortunately, Moody made the 44-yard game-winner as time expired and helped the 49ers get home with a win. When asked about the incident, Deebo said, “Just frustrated in the heat of battle. It was a close game and I kinda got out of character a little bit. But I’ll talk to Moody and we’ll get past it.”

Moody responded,  “Like I said, it’s in the heat of the moment – it happens. I do have to make those kicks at the end of the day, so that’s all I’m focused on. I’m not worried on anything like that.”

If Moody had missed that kick however, how might we perceive the notion of player accountability differently. Would we?

In the post-game press conference, Shanahan said, “I don’t have much of a take because I didn’t see any of it.  I just got told about it – but probably an obvious one, guys frustrated and something probably happened and you know brothers scuffle a little bit. I didn’t see any of it, so I don’t know how bad it was, but something I’m not too worried about, we’ll fix it. If it hasn’t been fixed already, we’ll fix it on the plane and go back to loving each other tomorrow.” 

I have to wonder what are Coach Shanahan's rules? What are his non-negotiables? Not a criticism, just a question. 

Photo Credits
Wooden
Coach and Deebo

Reverse Rubbernecking

Waze informed me it would be 12 minutes before I would get to and through the traffic jam. I noticed that the accident wasn't even on my side of the road. No lanes were closed and yet traffic ensued. How? Why?! Rubbernecking. According to Progressive auto-insurance,

Rubbernecking occurs when drivers take their eyes off the road to look at a distraction, such as an accident or arrest. The term originated in the late 1800s to describe the act of turning and stretching the neck to eavesdrop. Today, it's synonymous with the same motion but is now commonly associated with the action that takes place while driving—namely slowing down to see an event that happened to someone else. Rubbernecking is a form of distracted driving that can be as dangerous as texting or talking on the phone while driving. 

To me, rubbernecking isn't that much different than gossip. We are curious creatures. Who doesn't want the low down? We want to know, but, like gossip, we seldom feel better after engaging, or in this case, taking the long look. Still, this blog is not meant to be a rant on rubbernecking or to preach against the tyranny of talk. Instead, I would like to offer all sports fans a practice worth pursuing. In June 2019, I wrote "Practice Reverse Gossip." Now I would like to offer a similar post. You guessed it: reverse rubbernecking.

This morning at the gym, highlights of the Golden State Warriors win over the Boston Celtics decorated and dominated local and national sports news. From Warriors' Coach Steve Kerr getting booed (for not givingCeltics star, Jason Tatum much playing time in the Olympics) to the recent success of the Splash Buddies, (the Splash Brothers are no more) there was enough electric content to make this reel worth running every half hour.

I noticed that every time the game summary appeared on the TV, I couldn't look away. In no way was I gawking. I found myself watching again, and again and again. Hadn't I just seen these shots? I marveled at one player among the others: Stephen Curry. Steph not only led the Warriors with 27 points, 9 assists, and 7 rebounds he made it look effortless. And that is how it felt to take it all in....

I took my eyes off of my weights and kept them on the screen. I remained curious; I wanted to see more. As I did, I realized my brain slowed down. It felt as though it opened up in watching but one thing or in this case one athlete (see Flow channel). My friend Jimmy, a die hard Celtics fan admitted "much respect for Steph. One of my all time favorites to watch." I wasn't the only one to feel this way. 

What's the lesson to learn? Watch! Enjoy the long look. Give your brain a positive pause. Let it soak something in. Rather than taking your eyes off the road and turning your head, reverse the rubberneck. Keep your focus on what's seeking your attention.

Obviously this analogy can only go so far. It falls short because the fact of the matter is if you are driving a car, you're not free to just pull over and gaze. You have some place to be. And yet, I think there's a need to name this playful  idea.

Reverse rubbernecking— came about as I stood near the start line of the WCAL III cross country race. Though I have not coached XC since 2015, I make a point of attending what is final league meet of the season every year. It takes place at a true cross country course—Crystal Springs. The 3.1 mile trek is situated in a space replete with rolling hills, very few trees and a designated path. One my think it's open space, but its primary function is for the sport of cross country, and in particular to showcase a race like this one. Once I got there, I knew I was in a place where I would see something special. 

At WCAL I in early October, I caught sight of a fantastic runner—one who makes a case for reverse rubbernecking. I didn't know anything about this senior, but I heard a buzz from the crowd when the varsity boys race convened. In a few minutes time, I realized why. The winner Miles Cook from Sacred Heart Cathedral Prep took the lead very early on and at no point in time was it close to compromised. As he emerged through the tunnel and onto the Polo Fields, the crowd started cheering as he completed this final 400 m to the finish line. He came through running fast and looking strong. Exhaustion? pain? agony? not on his face. He too made it look effortless. To watch him run was a thing of beauty. It's something for every sports fan to savor. Though that is not the reason I went to WCAL III, once I was there, I was excited for what I was in for. Cook did not disappoint.

Take these images to heart. When you see sport at its best: watch! Don't look away. Give your brain a break and let it behold what is unfolding before your eyes.

I wonder if I commit to reverse rubbernecking—will I find more to enjoy? Will I encounter more sport to savor? I'm happy to focus in on Steph this season as a social experiment. Stay tuned.

Photo Credits
Rubbernecking
Coach Kerr
Miles Cook
Highlights: Photo and reel is here

Thank you, Dodgers: A Personal Ethic of Sports Gambling

Bless me Father for I have sinned. It has been three months since my last confession. This is what I have done wrong: I bet on the Los Angeles Dodgers.

While I would not seek out the Sacrament of Reconciliation for gambling on the World Series Champions, I did send this text to a friend of mine—a Jesuit priest and ardent Dodger fan. He was delighted to read that I believed in his team enough to put my money behind them. I did. I won.

When I heard the odds, the Dodgers -140, I quickly placed a straight bet on LA to win the series. Those pesky Dodgers have one stacked line-up and the third highest payroll in MLB. I knew enough about the team and the Yankees to consider this to be a smart bet.* However, as each game unfolded, my smart bet felt like a dirty one. Not because it's illegal or illicit, but because in betting for LA to win, I found myself cheering for them—and for me, that's a problem. Fortunately, I learned a lesson that I would like to share with all sports fans and especially the parents of young sports fans: I believe an ethic of (sports) gambling is important.

Maybe you think that's funny or unrealistic. One friend said to me "You have this because you are a Religion teacher and teach ethics. but I think it's worth consideration. Sports betting is incredibly accessible (thank you internet) and unstigmatized. I liken it to a controlled substance. There is an age requirement for legal gambling (21) and it can be entertaining, engaging and fun. It is also risky and for those with addictive tendencies, it can be problematic. I do believe that those who choose to gamble ought to consider how they plan to participate. What can one afford? What are the limits? What if you push the limits? We know the benefits, but what are the consequences. Those are the formal rules, but this Dodger bet invited me to consider others.

I can and will never bet against my own team. I hold this as a categorical imperative. I am not willing to put my personal loyalty aside for the purpose of financial gain. How I support my team holds no bearing on the final outcome and yet I am too emotionally tied to my team's success. I hate losing, period. To lose the game and win money is cognitive dissonance. When a friend who self-identifies as a Yankee fan told me he bet on the Dodgers as well, I found myself questioning his devotion to the Bronx Bombers. I asked, "Are you a big Yankees fan?" What is your thought on this? Consider the question in the creation of your own ethic.

By a similar standard, I don't bet ON my favorite teams: the Fighting Irish, 49ers, Giants or Warriors. I cannot say I would never do it. I won't commit to not doing it, but as a personal ethic, for me, it's better that I don't. I care too much. I get enough enjoyment out of my own teams' play that I believe gambling will compromise. Furthermore, making what a "smart bet" is clouded by personal bias; it's hard to be objective about one's team. And yet, I know no team better than my own. By holding an ethic to not betting on my own team, I take these questions and quandaries out of the question. 

Where it gets interesting is what the 2024 World Series left me. I know this was a dream scenario for MLB. I admit, the billing was much more interesting that the Rangers vs. Diamondbacks. I did not like either team and the truth of the matter is that gambling provides an emotional, exciting and direct way to engage. This is part of my ethic. 

I figured my derision for both teams opened a door of opportunity. I placed a reasonable bet—one I could afford to lose and would be happy to win and waited to see what would happen. 

Maybe it was the excitement of the series—and it was dynamic and thrilling. The first game in LA went into extra innings and easily could have gone to either team. Freddie Freeman's walk off home run was why we love October baseball. The talent of both squads, questionable choices of Aaron Boone, fan interference and its impact on the game as well as the importance of defense made for viewing numbers unlike those in years past. I'd like to think I kept an eye on the games and my ear close to the ground because I'm a baseball fan, but I know it's because I had money involved. I didn't tell most people I had a bet on the series because it prompted me to cheer for the Dodgers. Again: cognitive dissonance. I found myself singing the praises of the players I actively root against: Max Muncy, Gavin Lux, Blake Treinen? Ugh! Gross. If they had lost, one could argue that would fuel my fire for this rivalry. Instead, we were now close bedfellows. 

The 2024 World Series taught me that an ideal situation....and I think it is now part of my ethic, is if my team is NOT in the final contest, to bet on a team that I like that isn't at odds with my own team. For example, if the Niners are not in the Super Bowl, I have no problem cheering for the Buffalo Bills. They are in another division, I like Josh Allen, I can rally behind Bills Mafia, I am tired of the Kansas City Chiefs, etc. This feels *right* to me.

In the past two years, I am indirectly aware that a large number of my students—seniors in high school are betting on sports. In my Sports and Spirituality class, gambling has become a hot topic in the student led Sports in the News presentations. There is a lot of joking and snickering around the subject. Students speak of the odds, the over/under and  more. In short, there are regular attempts to integrate the language of sports betting into class. I never knew "parlay" would be so colloquial! Students have asked me my stance on sports betting, and I've told them. I opened a Draft Kings account for the sole purpose of finding out for myself how easy it is to place bets and the extent of what one can gamble on. The options are endless. In fact, I found it remarkably difficult to place a straight up bet, the app was littered with prop bets, teasers and more. When I mentioned that certain sports bets were not possible to place in California, several students advised me to access a firewall. I realized quite quickly what used to be a bit of a joking matter, was now an everyday activity, a common experience and a culture I help support. 

If you haven't thought about an ethic around sports betting, it's worth further consideration and conversation. Talk to others and get their thoughts—people hold interesting and varied points of view. One way to learn is to engage....if you do, good luck! And keep is clean ;-)

*Smart Bet: rhetorical statement. I wonder, do gamblers place any bet that isn't "smart" in their own eyes? Maybe... again, more worth consideration

Photo Credits
Max Muncy
Trophy
Sports Bet