Two Words Every Coach Can and Should Say: Thank You

Every year, I attend close to half of all varsity boys' basketball games at St. Ignatius, where I teach. This year, a coworker/ friend and I picked a road game to attend, beyond the high profile Bruce Mahoney and Jungle Game. When the head coach caught word that we would be at the final regular season game, he invited us to the team dinner. I was touched that he thought to include us. He told me it is his way of saying "thank you." Those are two words that every coach can and should say.

In the Sacrament of Reconciliation, a good penance will ask the confessor to pray for the one who has been hurt, to resolve the past and as we can, to right the wrong. I also think that every priest could add a simple task to Confession. Advise the penitant—male or female, young or old to say or write two words: "thank you." 
Ignatian Spirituality.com writes

St. Ignatius believed ingratitude to be “the cause, beginning, and origin of all evils and sins.” The quote is from a letter dated March 18, 1542, cited in this helpful article on gratitude by Brian J. Lehane, SJ. Fr. Lehane writes: Perhaps God doesn’t necessarily want us always to be saying “thank you” so much as to be noticing how much we are loved and cared for by Him and, in turn, to respond by living a life of gratitude. Grateful people tend to be more generous and magnanimous with others.

I think Fr Lehane is right, those who live a life with thanksgiving are easy to be around. They take less and give more, they notice others, anticipate their needs and appreciate their surroundings. Oh, and I think they say "thank you" and write it too.

At a faith sharing meeting, a co-worker mentioned another colleague who has been a source of grace in her life. She prayed in thanksgiving for her tireless support and generosity. She admitted how much more this mentor teacher has going on in her life—she is a mom, a wife, and a varsity coach. Her words resonated with me as I have turned to this coach during the height of our seasons seeking her insight and wisdom. My sport doesn't require half of what hers does and yet, she has never made my concerns or challenges feel insignificant. A third co-worker chimed in by adding "Haley is the only coach who has ever written me a thank you note for attending her team's game." I shouldn't have been surprised. I wasn't. And yet, I was.

I have never thought of writing a "thank you" note to my colleagues for attending a meet, match or regatta. Never. It's not hard to do and this gesture obviously has meaning.

I asked Haley about her practice. She admitted that she writes thank you notes or sends e-mails to colleagues for attending because "it means SO much to the girls when they see their teachers there. They love it when people show up for their games. And, it means a lot to me, too," she said. 

Her remarks only deepened my appreciation for Haley as both my friend and as another coach. She takes notice of what matters to her team and what matters to them, matters to her. Ignatius of Loyola writes that "love is shown in deeds." The love that Haley has for her athletes and her team is put into action in extending gratitude. She says "thank you" and writes it too.

I am going to consider how I can extend gratitude to those who support my golf program.I invite other coaches to do the same. It can start with an invitation to a team dinner or just  those two simple words....

Photo Credits
Written Thank you